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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

Original poster

Please help: friend's grandson has been diagnosed with down syndrome...

10 replies

PippiLangstrump · 02/05/2007 23:08

... two days old.

Could you please tell me the bast way to be of any help and be there for him without being patronising or pathetic or saying the wrong thing?
I am worried that whatever I say it's wrong and stupid and pointless because 'how can I know' IYSWIM, but at the same time I do not want to disappear and ignore it.

TIA for your response they'll be much appreciated.

OP posts:
mummytosteven · 02/05/2007 23:43

no personal experience of downs syndrome, but I would imagine do the usual new baby congratulations/questions, and then wait until the grandparents are ready to talk about how they feel about the downs syndrome. the downs' syndrome association website will I imagine have useful info on for you and the grandparents.

mummytosteven · 02/05/2007 23:43

should have been "feel about the downs syndrome diagnosis"

Aloha · 02/05/2007 23:47

First and foremost this is a beautiful brand new little baby we are talking about. Send a card and flowers or whatever you would normally do, plus heartfelt congratulations. No hint of comiseration. If they seem frightened or worried then you might mention the Down's Syndrome Association and find out the address & website for them.

Original poster
PippiLangstrump · 03/05/2007 00:09

thanks a lot for your answers.

I am happy as I had already done all that.

Maybe I am just worried that I am not doing enough.

OP posts:
Califrau · 03/05/2007 00:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

eidsvold · 03/05/2007 08:36

congratulate them for the beautiful new babe they have. do all the things you would do if someone had a baby without down syndrome.

again there are a number of organisations like the down syndrome association that you can direct them too.

that is all I wanted when I had dd1 - I had just become a mum to a gorgeous wee babe - yes she happened to have down syndrome and a heart defect but she was our baby - our first. We knew about her diagnosis before her birth.

Just wanted people to see her as we did - our beautiful daughter. Flowers, cards, best wishes etc are all that are required. We also had friends who had children with ds who were great helps in the days that followed.

DSA - UK were also brilliant for information and just chatting to as well.

bobalinga · 03/05/2007 09:05

Please send them cards of congratulations. They have a beautiful baby. When mt DD was born brain injured there was a deathly silence in the crads dept and no-one came to see her. Bloody awful.

Woooozle100 · 03/05/2007 12:35

We got a sympathy card [staggering disbelief at misplaced good intention bordering on gross insensitivity emoticion] (dd has other chromo disorder)

I think what everyone else is saying about about celebrating the birth of baby in all the usual ways is spot on. Don't avoid your friends - and if they ever do want to talk about any sadness they feel, just be there and lsten to them.

All the best x

theheadgirl · 03/05/2007 13:02

Hi. My DD3 has Downs, and the best responses were the normal ones - the "congratulations" and "oh she's beautiful". And don't feel you have to avoid the subject of Downs, but be positive about it. 2007 is a good time to be born, things are looking good for the future, and this little one will get lots of help to reach their full potential. All the best xx

Original poster
PippiLangstrump · 03/05/2007 20:58

thank you very much to you all again. Really. I will do!

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