Toddler possibly has autism?

[Lovelysolorio97]

So long story short going to give timelines
During my pregnancy my baby randomly turned head up at 7 months old. The drs didnt know why and said could of been shape of uterus. Didnt think much of it.
When she was born- couldnt breathe on her own needed oxygen. drs suspected turners. Due to her seamless palms,low hairline, low set ears, inward thumbs, and wide set nipples. Test negative.
3 months was not lifting her head. Was not cooperating during tummy time.
She was basically behind everything.
Recently. She has been having tantrums out of nowhere. Shell just be happy and a second later throw into a tantrum. She doesnt like loud noises. She needs to play with hair to calm her down. Very strange if shes upset she plays with my hair and it makes her feel better. She pokes her eyes a lot and will hit herself. She hates car rides. She gets overwhelmed in public if its too loud she will get extremely irritated she can also cry for hours. Last time she cried 3 hours straight. I finally got a referral to get a autism evalutation it took this long because the pediatrician was always saying i wasnt trying hard enough. But i sought a second opinion and they said she needed to be evaluated especially because she doesn't talk as much as she should max words she knows is 5. She doesnt socialize with other kids. Sometimes i get so frustrated with her at stores because it wouod be out of nowhere where she will just throw herself outof nowhere and theres nothing i can do to calm her down. I have to give her candy or have to leave my buggy and leave the store. Its so embarrassing sometimes. I am a single mom so her dad doesnt help at all. He never takes her so i can have a day to myself. She constantly throws fits sometimes i just have no choice to just let her hit herself and slam her head on the floor because if i try to calm her down she will bite and hit me and if i tell her no she cries until she throws up. I love her i really do but i dont know how to deal with her sometimes. I feel like a bad mom because sometimes i let her do what she wants so i can avoid hours of crying and tantrums. She just doesnt take no for an answer and shes not the kind to get over it in minutes shell go crying for hours until she gets what she wants uf not shell self harm. Does this sound like autism? And what can i do to stop the behavior?:(

How old is your DD now OP? A friend of mine has a DD with some of these behaviours and they are being referred for an autism assessment, but she is older than a toddler (3.5).

What did the paediatrician think you should be trying harder with? These things sound very sensory, so not clear what they are suggesting you should be trying harder with? Do you have a date for your referral yet? Hope you can get some insights and support soon.

Shes 2.5 years old. But my mother takes care of my cousin who is younger than her and i can definitely see a difference between them. My cousin will let me know when shes hungry,when shes sleepy, when she has to use.the bathroom,and tell me what she wants. If i tell her no she stops. On the other hand my baby never tries communicating with me. She cries for everything. So it makes it kinda difficult to know what she wants. If i ask her more than once what she needs thrn she gets angry at me for repeating words to her. The pediatrician told me it was because lack of sleep. I had stopped letting my daughter take naps because it would be a 2 hr nap and she would want to stay up till 1 and wake up at 6 in the morning but she would wake up in between those hours. I didnt like that. So i stopped naps and she was sleeping 10 hrs straight. Which was better for me because as a single mom i couldnt afford the lack of sleep. But i did try everything to get her on a sleeping schedule it would be naps at 12pm and bedtime by 830. But she wouldn't bugde. I would make sure the room was dim, heavy blankets, lullabies, soft music, rockinh her, putting her in a crib. Old wife tales amd nothing she kept waking up at night. So i thought she had a sleeping problem. But the pediatrician told me it was because she wasnt eating even so i wpuld stuff her with food which she is a really bad eater. Getting her to eat is really hard. Ive sat down with her tried feeding her. Cutting fruits or vegetables in shapes shell just play with the food. The only thing i goten her to successfully eat is apple slices and grapes and anything with cheese. Otherwise she wont eat meat. Shed barely eat bread but she will drink tons of milk. She gets angry if i give her milk in a sippy cup she will only drink out of a bottle i tried many times to take the bottle away but she will starve herself or keep throwing the sippy cup at me. I told the pediatrician they just said she had to get used to it that behavior was fine because thats a response im getting. So when i told her about her tantrums she said shes only 2 what do you expect? I told her to me they didnt seem normal all she was like was change her diet and let her take naps again. Well i did! And shes still throwing tantrums yesterday she was angry in thr carseat cried all car ride even though i lwt her nap before her appt. And the crying in the car is a every day thing. Even if i give her a toy shell just throw it and cry. I still havent had a date set yet but i should br getting a call soon.

I seem to remember a lot of DD's friends were dropping naps at 2.5 and their wasn't much their parents could do about it!!

Are you in the UK? Unusual to have a paediatrician here... Can you get a second opinion wherever you are? Just suggesting you constantly mess around with diet and sleep times doesn't sound that helpful (and not that doable either: if she has sensory issues then sleep and food will be a challenge and you need some specific advice on what to try, not criticism of your parenting!)

There, not their, sorry!

Oh really? Her pediatrician said naps shouldnt be dropped. I would have to find alternatives to get her to nap. Plus when i was younger it was mandatory to take naps in kindergarten so i thought naps were essential at her age.. No in the us but couldnt find us forums regarding autism. Its ok shes my first kid. But i don't constantly change i kept the naps at 12 and bedtime by 830 for a one year. Then i didnt let her nap anymore when she was about 15 months. The diet yes i do constantly change that because theres some good days where shell eat and theres some where she wont eat at all. The pediatrician suggested a variety of food rather than same food everyday. She even suggested cutting into shapes to intrigue her to eat. Even if i do have find something she will regularly eat she wont eat it if she doesnt feel like it. Sometimes ill try to feed her and shell spit it right out or stick her fingers in Her mouth to intentially throw it up. Getting her to eat some days can be very hard. I have caught her staring at her stomach in the mirror but i feel like shes too young for body image issues. I understand i feel like i must be doing something wrong regardless following directions. I ask my parents for advice and they basically tell me she has issues because none of us where like her. Even my cousin with an autisc kid told me i just have to make the best of it. It helps her kid to eat if she turns on the tv for him but i seriously dont want to do that for my kid.