Giving up on school......

[reliantrobin]

Hello,

I've posted about my DS (5) before. He was excluded from school last term due to behavioural problems. In summary, he will not conform with the teacher's requests and also finds it hard to adapt to any changes. Things came to a head in January when he was restrained . The developmental paed saw him at the end of Jan and thought that DS was not ASD, but showed "oppositional" behaviour.

Since then, DS has been taught at home for 1 hour per day by the specialist teaching service. He started back at school for 1 hour per day just before Easter with their support 1-1 in class.

The hope was that this would help him to settle.

Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to be working. DS is still anxious, afraid of school and being "dragged" by the teachers. Each time I have collected him DS has been in floods of tears. It seems that the prospects of him ever going to school (or at least that school) happily are slim.

There will be a review meeting in 2 weeks time.

I'm really at a loss about what to do. 1-1 support does not seem to be helping.

Does anyone know what happens if DS is considered to be "school phobic"?

Thanks.

Can't think of anything helpful much but just to offer support for you and your little boy. What a horrible experience of school for him at such a young age. It sounds as if this particular school cannot cope. Do you think it is the school or truthfully is his behavious such that any mainstream school would have significant difficulties and it impact negatively on the education and welfare of others? If it is the latter then your best course of action may be looking at the special school/ EBD school route. It is up to the education authority to educate your child. Obviously they are going to try and do it as cheaply as possible for them which usually means bunging in one to one support into mainstream and hoping everyone survives. However, this might not be the best for your lad. You do have a significant case in that at this age the social aspects of school and interaction etc etc are as important as the reading and writing side of things. don't just let them keep him at home with you with a bit of home tuition - its the easy option for them and means it significantly impacts on your life.

You don't mention what your lad is like at home - do these behaviours continue there?

Good luck. Sorry I can't be of much use.

Hi reliantrobin

I'm so sorry you and ds are going through thisyour ds sounds so like mine at the same age and we had the same problems with school. I just wanted to reassure you that things can get better. I removed ds from his old school and he now has a statement and f/t 1:1 in another school and he is doing really well. I was worried that what had happened in his old school was going to put him off school forever but it hasn't I haven't got much time now as i am in the middle of an assignement that is already very late but if you want to chat to someone who has been through a very similar situation then CAT me.

I removed DS from school at 7 after 2 years of struggling with school (he has AS) and we home educated. Totally different child. Its been a wonderful experience and I got my little boy back, not the tearful, anxious mess the school had turned him into.