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Original poster

DS with ASD starting school Sept 2018 - I am feeling overwhelmed

992 replies

Hurricane74 · 07/11/2017 14:48

Hi

My son has a diagnosis of ASD and is due to start school next Sept. We are in discussion with the LA about an EHCP and have a Joint Assessment Meeting for early December. I had hoped he would go to a mainstream school and see how it goes, with the option of a school with an autism unit or a SS is things don’t work out. But now am feeling very doubtful a mainstream school could meet his needs. We had a report from the LA yesterday based on observations of him at preschool and it makes such sobering reading. It puts his developmental age at 8-20 months for most areas (he is 40 months) and his understanding and listening skills at 0-11 months. (His moving and handling skills are almost age appropriate). His main issues are social anxiety, sensory issues around noise and his lack of understanding and speech. Has anyone experience of a child with similar issues managing in a mainstream setting? If so, what kind of provision did you ask for and receive? Thanks for reading.

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LightTripper · 13/12/2018 11:02

DD's nativity this morning! She did it! She didn't have to do any lines or stand in the middle or anything (she was the star Star Grin), but she managed to sing all the songs and even do some of the actions, and came to find us at the end without getting upset. She was looking sideways at her teacher instead of at the audience to start with (she was standing by the piano), and was zoning out and yawning quite a lot (which she tends to do if she's stressed) and not looking at us much BUT so proud of her and she seemed to really enjoy herself and feel really proud of herself at the end.

The only tricky bit was when it was time for us to go, when she got upset. But even then I was quite impressed because when I suggested ideas like "shall we go and find your teacher?" she nodded and managed to do it so she was really holding it together pretty well despite the tears. It's always a bit of a worry to leave them crying but her teacher is lovely and I'm 99pc sure she will have been happily getting changed and reading a story within 10 minutes of us going...

Anyway, one more day of term to go, and then she's got 3 days of a holiday scheme (at school, doing art and crafts which she really likes, and shorter days than normal, so hopefully she'll like that!)

Phew, now I've just got to get through a couple of crazy deadlines at work, write and send all the cards, wrap all the presents.... easy peasy eh?

livpotter · 13/12/2018 13:01

Well done to your dd light! You must be so proud!

We have one more week of term here. Can not wait till the holidays to get a break from the normal routine.

livpotter · 13/12/2018 13:02

Well done to your ds too dimples.

Ds has his next week, not convinced it will go as well as both of yours.

openupmyeagereyes · 13/12/2018 17:12

Light that’s brilliant, well done her Star

liv I hope yours goes well.

Term finishes for us on Wednesday.

Shall we have a new thread?

LightTripper · 13/12/2018 23:28

Oh wow, have we nearly run this one out? That went fast! I'd love a new one, what shall we call it? Reception Auties? Looks like we are probably on course to fill it again before we get to Year 1!!

openupmyeagereyes · 14/12/2018 06:04

Good luck with your deadlines Light. I have written all our cards and those for school - reception class and a handful of year 6 boys that are really kind to him. There is one in particular that he idolises. I still need to wrap the teacher and TA’s presents and make or write their cards. I have not yet wrapped any presents other than those I’ve had to post, plus I still have some to buy.

Dh has now finished work for Christmas so we are going for brunch this morning and a wander round town, a rare luxury!

dimples76 · 14/12/2018 06:54

Open I'm rather jealous having read your latest message! Enjoy your brunch. You sound super organised.

Light well done to your DD.

Liv we have a week left too. Good luck for next week.

I feel so far behind on everything. My sister has to work at Christmas so she and BIL are coming to stay this weekend..the house is not particularly tidy, sheets need changing, no cards written, no pressies wrapped ...

I would love another thread

openupmyeagereyes · 14/12/2018 07:55

dimples I don’t work so massively easier for me. I used to work in finance and this time of year was one of our busiest times ramping up for year end. I remember how tough it can be and I didn’t have dc then. I hope you can all get everything you need to done without too much stress Brew Cake

openupmyeagereyes · 14/12/2018 08:07

New thread. Hope it’s worked ok.

livpotter · 14/12/2018 08:33

Thanks open. Hope you have a lovely brunch today!

Thanks dimples. I must buy tickets for it today.

Hope all your work is going well light

LightTripper · 14/12/2018 09:54

Enjoy your brunch/wander dimples!

I've just found out that something that was supposed to be landing before Chritmas with a 4 week deadline to respond (thanks) is now not coming until early January at the earliest so yay for that! Find out about another deadline today... keeping everything crossed it's not too crazy.

Had to say goodbye to DD's teacher today. We will really miss her (and obviously it's a worry whether she's been the source of some of the accommodations as I think she really "gets" DD). But the SENCO seems really on the ball too, and DD likes the other teacher who will take over, so I'm going to assume that everything will be fine...

danni0509 · 14/12/2018 12:29

Will join the other thread now, thanks.

Soumia · 28/09/2019 21:30

Mine is non.verbal...i am very veeery worroed as I have tried everything...he will be 5 in january

:(

openupmyeagereyes · 28/09/2019 22:27

@soumia this thread is nearly a year old but it’s worth a read from the beginning to give you insight into everyone’s experience.

Honestly, if your child is completely non-verbal I’m not sure whether mainstream is right for him. I suppose it partly depends on how good his receptive language is and whether he can communicate his needs non-verbally.

Soumia · 29/09/2019 06:28

@openupmyeagereyes

Thanks...i have read 20 pages...then got overwehlmed...i have 4 kids to look after...2 of which are autistic.....very useful.thread

But can anyone plz summarises to me:

My son hearing is soon as I appealed against LA special.school provision...i want him to go to mainstream school + ABA..

My daughter EHCP assessment is accrpted after appeal...so i am waiting for LA to issue EHCP then ABA

Could you please advise me or share your experience about:

ABA...How long did u have it for

How good was mainstream for ur daughter

Please advise me...or direct me to the correct link..

Thanks

Soumia · 29/09/2019 06:29

@openupmyeagereyes

My son receptive language is improving...i am working very hard on it...as well as on PECS...Usibg ABA

openupmyeagereyes · 29/09/2019 08:31

@soumia

I have posted on a couple of your threads already. We do not use ABA with our son who is 5.

Overall school has been positive, we have had ups and downs as you will see if you read all of our 3 threads.

My son is verbal though and he has 1:1 support from teaching assistants. He is currently behind his peers academically but progressing. We don’t know if the school will always suit his needs, we will take things one year at a time.

The reception year is quite deceptive I think. It is more like nursery so very play based and many have free access to outside spaces, though obviously they are starting to do formal learning too. The big challenge for all children is the transition to more formal learning in year 1 where the focus is on reading, writing and maths and they are expected to sit, listen and work for longer periods. This can be very tricky for children with ASC though some prefer the routine and structure it brings.

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