Nappies at school

[elliejjtiny]

Ds4 has just started school. Development about 2 years behind actual age. He's in mainstream school, no ehcp or 1 to 1 because the early years area senco thinks he doesn't need them . He also has some medical issues that hopefully shouldn't affect school apart from time off for appointments and operations. He's had about 14 general operations so far, 2 of them major 3 hour surgeries and several less than an hour day surgery ones. I'll admit I'm a bit overprotective of him.

Ds is in nappies full time. He's at school 9-12 at the moment and I've asked them to change him after playtime and when he is obviously wet or dirty, same as preschool did. So far the teacher has told me he has refused to let them change his nappy. Today I picked him up and he was smelly and obviously had a dirty nappy. I had planned to change his nappy at school anyway to help him get used to having his nappy changed at school. When I changed him it was obvious he had pooed a while ago. He was more than happy for me to change him. They've got one of those electric adjustable changing tables which he loved moving up and down, he would have been happy to stay there for ages. From what the teacher said I thought he would have been terrified.

I'm not sure what to do next. I'm wondering if the teacher isn't being firm enough eg if she is just asking him if he wants to be changed and then leaving it when he says no. Or maybe they are rushing him, he can't cope with that, he needs time to process information. He was fine with having his key worker at preschool change his nappy but it was a sn preschool with a 1 adult to 2 children ratio so they had much more time for him.

He's not that keen on school in general. He likes the toys and he is OK when he's there but he cries every morning when I put his uniform on him and he was so excited at the weekend when he found out he wasn't going. I don't blame the school, I feel like they have been put in an impossible situation with not enough staff and time to look after him properly. Should I be pushing for an ehcp? Giving him a chance to settle in before doing anything? Or wind my neck in and stop being an overprotective control freak?

I can't see why a child with your ds's needs would not need an EHCP. Have you tried starting the process yourself?
In the meantime (because an EHCP can take months even if the LA cooperate), can you ask the school about applying for higher needs funding? This should help them with extra staff to help your ds.
Has he just been left to manage on the same level as all the other children? It is no wonder he isn't enjoying it much .
Are you sure that the teacher isn't just using the 'he won't allow it' to get out of actually doing the nappy change?
Sorry loads of questions.

My dd started school in nappies. The TA took her to the toilet and changed her twice a day, on the occasions when she had a poo I had to go in and change her.
By the end of reception she had a 1:1.

Despite receiving higher needs funding, having a 1:1, involvement from school nurse and bladder and bowel specialists, it still took me to mention an EHCP - no-one else did. So please get the ball rolling yourself.

My dd is developmentally delayed and has ASD but now aged almost 6 1/2, she's finally out of nappies during the day!

Thankyou. He was getting high needs funding at preschool so that has transferred over to the school and they need to reapply in march I think. I'm not sure how much it is and what they use it for. We had a bit of a breakthrough today. Now he knows about the remote control changing table and has been there with me and been allowed to look around with no rushing he has decided he likes it there. In fact he likes it so much he has been asking to have his nappy changed whenever he fancies a walk around the school and a play with the changing table . So that problem is solved.

If I try to go for an ehcp on my own do I need support from professionals to have a chance at getting one? Now that the early years area senco has left his case and transferred him to the school senco I'm hoping I will get more support if I tried to get him an ehcp. Area senco just said I was being negative if I suggested it.

It would be hard to get one if school says everything is fine and he doesn't need any extra help. it sounds as if they would be unlikely to say that and easy to challenge if they did.
You presumably have loads of reports and evidence of his needs from the professionals he has been involved with so can make a good case. It is good to have support from the school SENCO but if you make the application, you are more in control of the process and you can appeal if you need to.
Area SENCO sounds naive at best. You know what he needs and that is very positive not negative.

www.ipsea.org.uk/what-you-need-to-know/ehc-needs-assessments