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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

Do you ever wish people would just leave you alone? Can you manage perfectly well?

6 replies

QuiQuaiQuod · 31/08/2017 14:59

As in: constant interfering about you and your SN child? from the so-called 'services'?

I have family and friends who help with DC if and when I need them, but Im 100% able to care for and cope with DC.

DC has ASD, ADHD and tourettes. and some physical problems.

She is now home ed as she couldnt cope in a school envioronment, with noise and crowds.

her social life is extremely limited but she has a handful of friends she sees when she can manage.

but until I started HE no one ever asked about her wellbeing and social life.

Now this is all I get. and the constant ''she SHOULD have a social life, she MUST develop properly ''etc etc, y strangers and so called experts.

As her mum i know my child better than anyone else.

Im also a qualified SN teacher and former SENCO.

yet they do not listen to me or take me seriously.

all they see is 'single mum on income support' type thing.

I find the more they interfere the worse DC gets as she hates being 'prodded and poked' by people.

They say they have a duty of care. DC is not abused, not malnourished, not in any way or form mistreated, no one loves and cares for a child as much as I do.

But because she has sensory meltdowns and GP visits and assessments etc, Im constantly undermined as a responsible parent.

I sound paranoid and neurotic dont I? Im completely compus mentus.

As I said, I have a support system around me, why do they feel they need to interfere, and judge and consntly give me the 3rtddegree when there are genuine cases out there of abuse, neglect, child traffi cking etc? and they cant be bothered with those can they?

In our case, less is more.

DCs condition is lifelong, theres no cure, no medication, and DC cannot cope in a world that doenst understand or care. this is for LIFE.

shell never be able to be in society and work etc. her learning difficulties are severe. its almost like locked in syndrome except she cn move and communicate a bit.

it breaks my heart that she cant. I dont want her to be a vegetable rotting away, she HAS a social life within her limitations, but they dont hear that.

they feel every one with disablitites can be out there in society. and working.

for 1 person thats a paralympic athlete, theres 20 that cant move.
for 1 person with sn that can work there are 20 that cant.

sorry this is long, Ive had it with these bloody degree ridden 'experts' who dont knoe one thing about daily living and managing to cope perfectly well.

Im not a robot, i get my 'moments' of despair, i get ill, i get bouts of depression, but i have my support. what bloody more do i do?

Id appreciate some hand holding, i cant answer straight back as i have to see to DCs needs, Ill tune in tomorrow. thanks.

OP posts:
QuiQuaiQuod · 31/08/2017 15:32

BTW Dcs 17. on paper. in mental age shes 5/6.

OP posts:
Annwithnoe · 31/08/2017 20:12

Offering a hand to hold. Flowers
In all honesty the biggest source of stress in my life is the professionals.
you sound like a wonderful mum.

QuiQuaiQuod · 01/09/2017 13:13

Thank you for reply. and your support.

sorry, im back late to my thread, have to find the odd moments to go onlione, while DCs having a rest and Im having a cuppa!

you are totally right. they sdtress me more than DC does. its not DC thats the prob, yes, shes high functioning and needs total attention and care, but thats natural and comes with the territry.

its when 'they' start making so called helpful suggestions, as in, interfering, thats when its stressful.

in all modesty im pretty adept to 'reading' my child and know what makes her tick and tock.

if i want help/advice ill ask for it, but i may not accept the 'suggestion' as i know full well its not the right thing for DC.

but they still believe they are right. FFS. Im not stubborn or anything, but i know my child and they dont.

its not like i dont try new and different things, itsa all trial and error.

OP posts:
BlackeyedSusan · 01/09/2017 15:37

so patronising. gits

only a parent so what do I know about reading. only over a decade of experience more than anyone else inthe room

sympathies op.

justme93 · 10/09/2017 20:19

I find the intrusive nature in which the so called professional try to teach me how to suck eggs grates on me often.. I have two boys with autism, I've jumped through all the hoops and done my research. I'm coping rather well, singlehanded I should add. I totally get what your saying, we do stuff alone.. if I need support I'll ask for it. Yes there's highs and lows - only natural I'd have thought! I just smile sweetly at their 'have you thought about this' suggestions. Virtual hugs from me to you OP x

DPSF3 · 15/09/2017 13:46

Hi I'm new to this site , and I was drawn to your comments cause I'm just feeling like u at the moment , and I totally agree everyone thinks they know best I just feel like telling all professionals to go away , , u sound like u do an amazing job and a warm hug from me .

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