Not sure why it annoyed me so much?

[mymatemax]

I am usually really thick skinned & don't let insensitive comments annoy me but this has been winding me up for 2 days...Thought if I shared it with you it might help!
One of the mums at DS2'S pre school said yesterday. "Just thought I ought to mention Oscar has a birthday party Saturday, I haven;t invited your ds as it is expensive & we were limited to numbers & well your ds won't really get the full benefit or enjoy it as much as the rest - hope you don't mind"
DH thinks I'm mad for letting the silly cow wind me up but... oh I really want to say all the smart things I've thought of since... But I actually just smiled sweetly & said Oh that's OK.
Thanks for letting me rant

how horrible . I'm not surprised you're annoyed. In fact now that I read the comments again I can't believe anyone could be so horrible.

Thats it the more I thought about it the more annoyed i became. The thing is she didn't need to say anything at all!

What a disgusting thing to say. Some people are just unbelievable aren't they?

Good grief some people are beyond belief - what an ignorant cow!!

Why on earth did she feel the need to say anything. What an insensitive thing to say.

How awful

Why on earth did she think she "just ought to mention"?! In case you wanted to buy dear Oscar a present!?

I think it annoyed you because it is so feckin' insensitive whilst at the same time the person saying it is oozing with 'aren't I sensitive actually explaining head on'

it comes down to a lack of experience / knowledge

she feels that she is doing the right thing by explaining to you her reasoning without fully (or even slightly) appreciating what exactly she is saying

she's a stupid twonk

My jaw literally, physically dropped reading that post. I am stunned. What a vile, vile person. I hope the fucking venue burns down. Bloody hell. Tell everyone what she said. Really. Let them know what a cow she is.

I agree. How vile. Sending bad karma to Oscar's poncey party. Oooh be good if word got round and all the other guests boycotted it. What an expensive waste of money then (though poor lad Not his fault he's got a revolting mom)

I was annoyed last year when dh's brother didn't include our dd on the party table for his kids (he did it twice) on account that it too would be a waste of money as she couldn't sit up properly or eat the food. Eh?!! Surely she could still sit there either with my help or in in her chair and still be included in the party. Pretty staggering really.

Christ!!!! And we are trying to teach the youngans to be accepting of all in this society.

My god, with adults like her around, the world has no hope!!!

mymatemax,
so sorry for you and I can completely understand how you feel as something similar happened to me a few years ago. My DS (now 11 and ASD) was only invited to a few parties in Reception and Year 1 and when the other mums realised that I had no option other than stay with him, as he could not be relied on to behave appropriately, the invites tailed off. One day, I overheard a mum say to to her DS 'make sure you give your party invites out and don't forget not to give one to (my DS). Then I heard another mum saying to someone that she 'would not allow to come to her DS's party, because he was a 'pain in the *rse! The real killer though, was when my DS had to take invites into school every day for a week, to get 4 children to attend his birthday trip. All the ones he invited said they were 'busy' that day and the 2 who did finaly accept did not turn up on the day. Absolutely heart-breaking and sadly is not a rare occurance amongst those who are uneducated and ignorant. Sending hugs your way.
Take care,
Scooby

Its like bloody racism at its best don't you think? Makes me so mad

Thanks everyone, your kindness & the G+T are slowly helping me calm down.... DS2 wouldn't have gone to her sons party anyway as ds2 hates parties of any kind.
But she basically said my ds is not "worth" having at the party because of his disabilities.
Ohh I hope one of the kids pukes all over her.

OMG! If someone said that about my dd I would be absolutely livid!!

She may as well say "People with disabilities don't matter. They are not really people" GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

She is completely out of order and I would have told her so. It's discrimination!

I think you did well to just smile and say ok at the time. I dont like confrontation and will avoid it but that would have wound me up.

I worry about my ds being excluded from stuff...! i think youve every rght to be

oh my god, how sad, that made me feel really upset reading that as I cant believe how nasty people can be!
I dont have a child who has any disabilities but would never not invite a child to a party of my daughter who did. This woman sounds shallow and disrespectbale and hopefully the only good outcome is that your child not attending means you dont have to socialise with that woman. it is unfair on your child and worrying how her child will be brought up. Hopefully her child will learn more from school/nursery etc about respect and discrimantion!

OMG.

Still stunned. I read your OP, thought it was horrific, then read all the other responses, and then reread your OP.

OMG.

How insensitive, callous, discriminatory, ignorant, etc, etc, etc.

I hope you have a great day anyway, some people should just be ignored, they aren't worth your attention.

May the pox be visited upon her and her family!

Actually not her family, that would be unfair, hopefully the little boy will still turn out OK...

So ust her!

not sure - it annoyed you cause she was rude, insensitive and basically a bitch!! What the hell did she hope to achieve by even saying something - that you would think she was so 'thoughtful' by explaining why she did it.

Stupid woman.

Do you know what? It would be nice to print this off and shove it in her face That would make her think twice