The paed reckons DS is borderline for having ASD - some things point to it but apparently quite a few things point the other way, e.g being co-operative with quite involved sets of instructions, and particularly the way he kept trying to involve me and/or DH in play once he got bored with the assessment (which wasn't until about an hour into it). She also said he was clearly very bright and that his motor skills were age appropriate. The normal next step would be a panel sort of assessment but as he's already getting three more home visits with video assssment from the SALT as part of the Hanen course she'll just meet with the SALT to discuss him after the the next visit. So the dx we have at the moment is "social communication disorder".
A couple of things struck me. One was that DS breezed through the stuff he found easy (shapes & stuff) but anything he found a bit difficult (threading beads) he soon got bored with and pushed it away or tried to get me to do it for him. The other was how hard DH and I found it to say whether he points in a proper "shared attention way" (with a look back at us) or not.