Ever Wanted to Punch some one?

[anniebear]

Was at a small regular coffee morning at Grace school today and I got asked how my weekend went

I replied that it was mixed, it was hard going at times due to Ellies tantrums and as she is getting bigger and her disability isn't visible that People are looking thinking what a horrible child

My cousins wife goes also and she said "Oh but you can tell can't you? Put Ellie and Grace(Ellies twin)together and it is obvious that Ellie has a disability"

I was so annoyed with her

Some of you will have seen a photo of Ellie and her disability isn't visible at all. But even if it was, so what? There is no need to say that

I am still annoyed about it now

I realise I may be going a bit OTT,

But I think she was very rude, but its nothing new, she has said some other corkers before now

I'm not surprised you were annoyed but she may have been trying to reassure you that other people weren't just thinking she was a "horrible child". Bloody insensitve though.

i was thinking along the same lines as dustystar hun, just sounds like she needs to put her brain into gear before she opens her mouth.

yes, she is very nice actually, but comes out with stuff that you just sit there and roll your eyes!!!

ikwym anniebear my sister in law also makes stupid comments about my DS who has ASD - try to remind myself that people don't mean 2 be nasty - just don't think about it - do sometimes want 2 smack her though!!!!

Yes. When someone commented about my son "Is he retarded?"

Er no. Are you?

snarl

But perhaps she was meaning, in response to you saying 'her disability isn't visible that People are looking thinking what a horrible child' - that they shouldn't be thingking what a horrible child becasue they can maybe see that Ellie has special needs. That her behaviour is so different to Grace that it should be obvious that she has special needs and so therefore people shouldn't judge her by thinking, as you said 'what a horrible child'.

Do you see what I mean.

I wasn't there so not sure how it was said but perhaps she meant it kindly and in a supportive way????

Maybe TC, She has come out with a few corkers before though!!!!!!

Yeah I didn't mean to belittle how you were feeling or anything btw. As I don't know her or how she said it etc etc I could be really wrong. But it just seemed there might be an explanation for what she was saying in this instance and I just wanted to make you feel a bit better.

Hope you're ok.
TC x

TC, didnt think for a minute that you were honestly!

It did cross my mind she might have been trying to make me better, but then thought of the other things she comes out with......nope!!!!!!

I know you didn't think that, I just felt the need to say it.
If she's said other things as well then my reckoning is she a dozy mare who isn't worth worrying about. Big love to you

defo a dozy mare!!!!! lol lol lol

People don't think and do make hurtfull coments i think it's becuase they don't understand.

When DS1 was diagnosed with CF MIL turned round and said, 'oh great so he is going to be retarded now is he, i will have to adapt my house!'

Cheeky bitch, we haven't spoken to her for ages and had the decency to tell her about DS's diagnosis and that what she said.

It is harder when a disability isn't outwardly obvious, i get filthy looks when feeding DS his medication in cafe's ect.

It was a very thoughtless thing to say and even if she meant well she could have thought about what she was actually saying. My parents in law can be a bit like that. My MIL once commented how well Ds2 was coming on - she said he could almost pass for a normal child who had just been badly brought up (ie when he does something strange or embarassing in public now we can pass it off for our poor parenting rather than his special needs ).