Please or to access all these features

SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

how to help DS's panicky feelings re learning

3 replies

leafandpetal · 10/07/2017 12:22

My DS is 12yo, with AS, in mainstream school. He has a statement. He has good underlying cognitive abilities but terrible concentration in lessons etc, so not doing well academically in school. One thing I've noticed when I'm trying to do homework with him is that he gets really panicky when he doesn't 'get' stuff quickly. Not just discouraged, but quite panicky. Then he just decides he can't do it, no point trying, and he gets really angry if I try to help or encourage him. He says he has the same panicky feelings in school but there he just sort of shuts down. I've tried to talk him through this - so far unsuccessfully - by explaining that rarely do pupils pick up everything first time, it's not just him. But that calmly going over something again, or looking at it differently can help. And so on. So my question is - does anyone have any ideas for helping him to re-frame this in his head. I feel if we could find him strategies to deal with this panicky response it could really help to unlock a lot of stuff for him. He has decided he is rubbish at everything, and of course his grades reinforce this for him.

OP posts:
leafandpetal · 11/07/2017 08:54

Just a wee bump in case anyone has any thoughts...Smile

OP posts:
Polter · 11/07/2017 10:52

Ds does this, perhaps not to the same extent as your ds and not for everything but it is really tricky. We just talk a lot about not knowing everything and look back at what he couldn't used to to and can now and I try to keep it lighthearted as much as I can.

CBT might help, have you seen the Dawn Huebner 'What to do when...' CBT workbooks? They're very good.

leafandpetal · 11/07/2017 13:54

Thanks Polter. I have a couple of those Huebner books, I'll check the others out. Yep, I'll try to find new ways of explaining how it can just take time. What I need is some 20 year old with blue hair and 'yoof' lingo to set up a YouTube channel doing KS3 maths. DS would listen to him...

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page