Threatening to kill himself/trying

[muckypup73]

Ok guys I need some advice, I have a child at primary school, he is always threatening to kill himself or telling other people to kill themselves,on 2 occasions he has tried getting hold of a knive or throwing himself off the bannisters, anyway just done a 5month stint at Cahms and she is pretty confident in me. (he has school anxiety) she said.

Anyway last week he had a meltdown, I phoned school, they phoned me back and whilst on the phone he sayd to me Iam going to kill you and then said he was going to kill himself, but I actually know him well enough now to now at that particulary point in time he would not have tried anything.

Anyway I decided to let school know everything that happens at home and on Friday he was on one from the minute he finished school, then he said he was going to kill himself and tried throwing himself off the bannister so it did not happen, wrote it down in the school diary so they are well aware.

Anyway obviously this will be a safe gaurding issue, and they have told me to ring for an amabulance, but why would I 1) phone for one when I know he is not going to and 2) if he tries, can I ask school for a copy of the safe gaurding issues? to show to someone who might actually do something about it? 3) what will school do about this?

Anyone?

I'm wondering if what they mean is get him to A&E to get a mental health assessment when he's having these extreme thoughts. I think an ambulance would be inappropriate.

However, it's clear he's really struggling so something is going on and whatever support he's getting isn't working.

Maybe time for school to up their game?

Polter, thats exactly what the pychologist said!, she said they need to be supporting him more, she knows I know when its serious or not, when it has been serious, when he has a huge meltdown, I have taken him to a&e, get reffered to Cahms, go to Cahms, get discharged its Asd,and again.

I wrote it in the diary today so they can see whats going on, I was told by my child that the teacher has said she cannot respond in his home/school diary because I asked for it, how sily is that? anyway I presume today it has gone to the learning mentor again because it is a safe gaurding issue, my worry is that because they do not see a hell of a lot of behaviour in school then we will get the blame.

Schools in our experience are very delusional about what CAMHS can provide. There is no magic wand that can overcome a lack of support at school. At one of our first meetings for ds1 at CAMHS they said that what he needed was an appropriate educational setting (be that mainstream with good support or a specialist school). They were right. When ds1 is supported well he thrives - take away that scaffold and he falls apart. If your bathroom is flooding because you've left on the tap you're going to be fighting a losing battle if you use your mop to clear up the water unless you turn the tap off. Not a great analogy but the best I can come up with at this hour.

Does he have a diagnosis?

I would start from there. Personally I would put in a letter saying I was very concerned about their lack of support of my DC. And I would want to meet with the SENCO and class teacher to see how they were going to improve his support.
I would also keep a journal (maybe even keep one in tandem with school) to try to identify trigger points. Is it worse on "off timetable days", are there certain lessons? Are lunch times and breaks an issue? Certain events?

Does he have a diagnosis of stress at all? I have found that useful to give one of my DC the occasional break from school when they really need it.

Thanks poulter thats a good way of explaining it.

mummytime, yes he has a diagnoses of Asd and spd, cahms have said he has anxiety, school anxiety although they have not wrote that in his report they have just wrote anxiety.

OneInEight, sorry meant good way of explaining it, when we were seeing Cahms he had a really good run,then we got discharged and it all fell apart.