I don't want to be doing this

[Thomcat]

Sorry, would you just allow me a moments self indulgence. I know we all have to do this and I've done it before etc etc, but...

I don't want to be filling out the Disability Allowance forms again, I just don't.

I'd forgotten how depressing they were.

I sat down with all 900 sodding pages (okay slight exaggeration but you know where I'm coming from), with a glass of wine and ended up in tears and coming upstairs to blub to you lot.

The first time I completed the forms she was 3 months old and it didn't hurt as much, but now....

I hated ticking f*ing 'yes' to every bloody thing, hated it.

Yes she has trouble walking, YES. Give more details, why - what more do you want to know, she can't walk okay. Will it be like this for 6 months or longer, yes it bloody will!

uggghhhhhh, [shoulders droop], feel better after that shout... but.....

now for the cry.............

ohhhh and I really did then

......... it's rubbish sometimes. Not often but it is sometimes, and this is sometimes, right now.

Ow it hurts, physically hurts.

I hated ticking that she has a mental illness, and all the other boxes in that column. I wish I could just say she has Down's syndrome and leave the rest to them I hate having to spell it out. It feels so negative. There's no room for the positive on that form, obviously and that's where I like to live in the positive, no need for negativity until you have to fill out bloody forms.

Okay, [shoulders up agin]. feel better, thanks.
Moment of self indulgence over, back to the wine..........

Oh, Thomcat, I'm sorry it's such a downer for you. Can't add anything to the advice here but agree with all those who say go and refresh yourself by having a giggle with the real, flesh and blood, laughing, loving Lottie, and not the 'paper' one that you don't even recognise.

just to say TC know how you feel and what a blody pain they are.

On a piositive note how's dd doing????

There was something in a newspaper today saying people with cancer had to fill the forms in and that the forms made them feel worse than the illness

People with terminal cancer are entitled to DLA but need confirmation that they are unlikely to survive beyond a certain number of months I belive that Soc Workers, DNs and/or MacMillan Nurses usually do it though, the patient doesn't usually do it themself or their carer.

Bugger! That was meant to be

Just wanted to send you some hugs Thomcat. I can see what hell this must be.

Davros, you get the prize for the most inappropriate smiley. Ever. (I want to put a smiley to show I'm joking, but it seems inappropriate so just believe me!)

Only just seen this thread and really have nothing new to add but just wanted to say "I know". They are horrid horrid horrid forms and I would love to put my dear dd infront of whoever the person is who looks at what is written on those forms and thinks "oh, we'll give you some money but only for a year/18 months" and say "do you really think this is going to go away by then? do you have any idea what you are putting us through by telling me i have to fill this form in again." I bet most of them have no idea....

Sorry, got a bit riled up then. I know its a day or two late Thomcat but my sympathies are absolutely with you. .

That smiley was a disasater, I knew I'd get a MN award some day! What I meant to say, is there are "special measures" in the case of people in palliative care and I'm not sure that the whole big form has to be filled in..... Won't attempt any other emoticons on this one

Davros - the smiley emoticon made me LOL and that can't be a bad thing in the middle of a discussion about DLA forms!

hiya Thomcat, just came across this thread. Poor you. I'm sure you are back on postive mode by now, but it is horrible horrible.

We had to fill in a new one last November and this time my dh filled it in as I couldn't bear to do it again. Like you and others here I had photocopied previous ones, so the job was made easier. He says that he found it less emotional to do than I have done in the past. Men seem to be better at detaching themselves? Anyway I think in 3 years time I will tackle it again and take it in turns. Maybe your dp would take it on next time?

My heart goes out to you Thomcat - I know this is hell. I had heard the photocopying idea and was told that some CABs can help fill them in? Not the one where I live, I eventually left it as I just couldn't cope with the sheer size of it. It was like an ugly hobgoblin sitting there, daring me to go near it. I was almost scared to start on it.
Eventually, the lady from Family Fund came round and offered to fill in the form for me. I was so relieved, I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. However, the worrying thing is she said she would fill it in for me at home and I never got to see it and what she wrote. That was 2 months ago and I got a letter about 2 weeks ago to say they had just recieved my forms! Arrghhhhh!
Anyway, just to comiserate with you and others in this position, they are bastard forms and I am sorry you have to do them. BIG hugs xxx

Well I thought with all the warnings and wonderful support material (from bhas - thanks a million to whoever posted that one) I would sail through the DLA form, but no, it has taken me hours and made me very depressed. You really have to rub your own nose in the sheer difficulty of it all, don't you? And our problems (ds1 has Aspergers) are so very minor compared with others'. Bloody shitty bureaucrats
Now, where's that bottle of wine?

we have filled out those damned forms 6 times, twice for dd1, 3 times for dh and once for dd2. i hate doing it. like you say, reading it thro, it doesnt seem like your child. they give u one section to fill in for the hospital doctors, dd1 sees 3 different ones plus her own gp. we have hospital addresses, depts and some phone numbers ingrained in our memory. they had the bloody cheek to turn dh down twice, then at appeal was turned down, then took 7months to award it, 2yrs after the 1st lot of forms went in and he couldnt walk to the end of the street of 4 houses. i still think they just randonly pick forms out for high/middle/low rate etc. makes me mad.