Dd is newly diagnosed with autism, though more extreme we are quite similar and it's a headache. Firstly all suppport is groups based, I'd rather eat the handout frankly and secondly I at times struggle to see which behaviours are not "normal". I don't consider myself to have an asc, yet I don't relate very well either to those I've met that are offering support and describing asd
Examples:
Dd is a fussy eater and limits food, I was very extreme at this as a child but grew into a healthy adult in time. I therefore feel more relaxed giving her time and space with food ( I even delayed puberty myself) but the clinic see it as a GOSH feeding referral and suggest all sorts that I know as a child would have fed my control issues
- I don't like group talking or talking about home life with strangers, therapy (and even hairdressers, I cut my hair) fill me with dread. I wouldn't relax enough in early bird etc to get out of it. I can for work as a means to an end, but I actively dislike groups
- I hate appointments, they seem full of suggestions, comments and asides I fail to pick up on at the time and info overload. I feel embarrassed after
- I like routine, if it doesn't affect function I see no reason to stop her ways. As I grew I naturally became flexible
-sensory, I don't watch tv at all and never have because I dislike the constant noise and lights. Never been an issue, I have other small habits I guess but not in public
-I don't like group socialising, but I have many good close friends
-I have certain interests I can obsess on, particularly maths, but I'm perfectly able to do other things. I was more obsessive as a child but relaxed
-eye contact is over rated, I can use it fine in my professional life but certainly relax more without it and drop it with family and friends. The consultant pushed it though at appts quite deliberately seeking it and I found myself getting angry
I could go on, but those are examples. I'm a happy woman, good family with a like minded mum/ dad/ husband and have had a professional job and happiness. Dd is intelligent, but quirky, though happy. She isn't craving social contact or to change herself. I may be expressing myself poorly and I hope I don't offend but many of her differences that are highlighted are just being her being her mothers daughter. I was possibly more unusual at her age, I could read a broadsheet newspaper at four for example. I feel it's my personality, I'd be stressed if I'd been forced to change it. I feel when I was at school I was given time and space to be me without issue, I could hide in the home corner, daydream, follow interests, be mute for days with little issue. It was seen more as endearing ways if anything, schools seems soooo prescriptive and conformist now. I would have certainly not fit the mould, but was very academic.
Total ramble, please don't jump on me, but does anyone sort of get this...?