Call from HV (Update to Aspergers Tendencies Advice)

[Flamesparrow]

Well the HV called back today.

She says she has spoken to the preschool and they haven't noticed anything (which is odd as they told me when I said she would be calling, that she has her "moments"), but that they also said that it is very structured there so she would be likely more settled.

They are apparently watching her over the next few weeks, talking to the HV again, then I have to go and see the HV to discuss where to go from there - whether I want to leave things and see how the progress as she gets older/do more/ probably offer "parenting advice" as its clearly only me who has an issue therefore me that is doing something wrong with her

Part of me thinks yay, its not causing any problems at school, and the other part is back onto "am i imagining it/making it up?"

Guess I'll let you know more in a few weeks....

IME it's very common for a child with AS/ASD to be difficult at home but okay at school/pre-school. It's not that you're doing anything wrong. Schools have a structure that no-one could reasonably replicate at home. A lot of children will also concentrate hard on keeping it together at school and then let it all out when they get home.

FWIW I've heard similar things about ds1 and ds2 (both AS/HFA). Last year ds1's teacher told me at parents' evening how he was obviously only very mildly affected by his ASD. A few weeks later things went pear-shaped at school and for several weeks they experienced the real ds1. Again the same thing has happened with ds2. The staff found it hard to believe that the ds2 I described at meetings was anything to do with the sweet-natured cheeky little boy they saw each day - until ds2 eventually gave them a full demonstration. This time I was the one saying "Well he's been fine when he's been with me....."

Whatever you do, don't base your decision on the school's report. If you feel something's not right then go with that instinct.

Hiya

NAS told me that it is the norm for kids with AS to be different at school to home. This is partly in relation to thm beings ettled, but of course also to the fact that AS kids feel more able to melt down at home where they feel safe.

Please don't leave your concerns- waiting lits can take months, then there's reports on top..... sam's first appt was at 2.5 (with the GP to ask for referral); he fgot a dx at 6.5.!!!!!!

One of my dts as ASD and has there was problem after problem for 3 years at school. Since August when he got a different teacher (a man btw) his behaviour at school has been wonderful but he has become absent, withdrawn and just plain weird at home. Think it's coz he likes this new teacher so much he's busting a gut to behave "normally" at school then reverts to his "normal" at home. I'd say go with your gut, you're her mum and I'll bet anything you know better than anyone.

Thank you I will keep on at them. I hate this constant niggling doubt that I'm just paranoid!!