Is it normal for the Dr doing the "initial appointment" to say things like "a dx will be on her record for life" and "you have to consider whether a diagnosis would be beneficial" and generally try to discourage us from going further with assessment/dx?
She mentioned trying to reduce waiting lists twice.
I have come away feeling like she hasn't got how much this is affecting DD, and the rest of us, and that she was effectively saying she didn't have anything, while admitting she does display most of the traits. 
I know that the service is under strain, but that doesn't make my child any less distressed. She had a panic attack (confirmed by GP) a month ago.
She is referring DD on, and also referring for something else to do with concentration and her anxiety, so that is good, but I had to be quite insistent.