strategies please help desperate mummy :(

[mummycuddlesxx]

Hiya, really struggling with my DS who's 5.5 years old. He's currently being assessed for ADHD, autism etc.. Iv been on at health care providers for a long time with no positive out come. Finally his school teachers are noticing issues and difficulties. I don't find the school helpful and are not really supportive of his needs. That's a whole new story though but for now I am trying to learn strategies to help him cope better in situations he finds a challenge. His education is now being affected and I'm concerned for him. The school has now suggested he may be below average in subjects such as reading and writing. They tell me He shouts out in class and disrupts the other children, he doesn't listen and gets so angry sometimes when he then shouts or cries loudly etc.. He is really struggling and I feel I'm doing as much as I can to support him and help him learn appropriate behaviour. There is more to this but I'm hoping some of you can help me learn some strategies to put in place to help him wait, be patient, learn appropriate behaviour, listen, not shout out etc. I'm really upset and worried for him and feel the school aren't listening to me, despite my constant requests for meetings etc.. Help xx

They tell me He shouts out in class and disrupts the other children, he doesn't listen and gets so angry sometimes when he then shouts or cries loudly etc

Whenever they say something like this you ask them what they are putting in place to help/to teach him. Or ask what they've put into place and why isn't it working. Or, if they have run out of ideas they bring an outside professional in.

My child with autism cannot generalise across different environments so needs to learn the correct way to behave on a setting by setting basis so I literally cannot teach him how to behave at nursery as I'm not there (and he wouldn't remember anyway!)

I agree with Antiquity - the school has a responsibility to meet your sons needs. They should be using the Special Educational Needs budget, a specific diagnosis is not required to get extra help. Ask to meet the SENCO for your school and get them to tell you what they are going to do. Ask if the school can request an assessment from an Educational Psychologist.

The strategies you put in place at home - will help at home, the school should get on with training their staff in strategies to support your ds at school, as different approaches will be required in different environments. How is he at home? Is he happier with a predictable routine, no surprises and does he have activities he loves to do obsessively? Their are lots of different sources of information for parents with children on the autistic spectrum and places like the National Autistic Society have a help line and can tell you about local services and support groups for parents - a clear diagnosis will help as well if that is possible.

NAS help line - 0808 800 4104
Monday-Thursday 10am - 4pm
Friday 9am - 3pm

Good luck.