Can I throw in the towel now? 1

[2boysnamedR]

Just a moan. I asked ss to help me as I'm at my wits end. Ds is to young as under five.

He is dx'd with Asd totally non verbal. All services have stopped ( early years, portage, pead) and he's got no ehcp.
I have to apply for a ms school by Friday. After much soul searching we have decided ms is never going to work and I am fed up of sharing personal details with a string of strangers who never make any difference.

So we have decided that our olders boys ( shite school have appealed three times for a statement they ignore ). can have him

Why? Because all local schools are covered by the same la staff so a fresh start isn't 100% possible. He's non verbal - he will fail where ever he goes. I don't have to tell school any backstory. I can be "he is non verbal and autistic. We both know I can not get funding so I suggest you crack on. Enjoy"

I really feel I have tried so bloody hard over the last six years with his brother and now him.

I don't want to do this anymore. I want my sanity.

My non verbal kid has no chance so why do I feel guilty in just playing the la game and saying "if it's a problem for you then it's a problem for you".

How bizarre. That really doesn't fit with the code does it? So they are assessing and the next decision will be wether to issue an EHCP or not?
It's all very tight for time - tbh I think your reasons for choosing a back up as the same school as siblings are sound.

I did secure him a place at a sure start nursery before he was accepted into his current SN nursery. That nursery said all the ehcp paperwork had to be in for December so it's very close to the wire.
I didn't know they wasn't following the code of practice? I did say to dh that if he gets into mainstream and then gets excluded with ehcp we might skip tribunal and go straight for legal action as his paperwork screams special school. A scary thought but I am sick of the LA getting away with not providing.

I did have a wobble about schools on the deadline but he's down for the sibling place. If he gets no SN school but a ehcp at worse I can get a closer / smaller school named.

The thing is with no portage, early years, health visitor or any professional I have no one to talk it through. My family are in denial and I hardly see them. My friends have NT kids. I do go to SN meet ups and I'm trying to increase my friendships in the SN groups but it's hard work with everything else. Just feel like I'm going mad some days!

Don't worry there you're not on your own!
All I mean is, even if nursery do put the application in, then you should get a yes or no to assessing within six weeks. Although this does seem to work in your favour in that if nursery apply then they will issue one?!

Is there a local charity relevant to his needs? Or your sendiass service? Someone you could just run it through with?

Parent partnership are quite good locally. I could talk to them as they should know how long my la take to deliver.

I have a case worker at the LA but they just keep referring me back to the nursery ( who are frustrated that no EP has been in yet). I have the name of the EP who assessed in when he was two so I could phone her too.

I just feel that if the nursery apply he has a better chance than if I apply. They will take on look at my surname and refuse

I agree 're nursery applying. If sendiass are any good it might be worth going through the times at least.