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Do I except formal diagnosis?

35 replies

MilkshakeMonkey · 05/11/2015 16:34

DS (5) was referred back in April due to behavioural probs (explosive, angry, violent outbursts), struggling to make friends and some oral sensory signs.

He has been up and down for years and we are on a better wave at the moment. Friend issues seem to have improved and he is doing really well at school - academically over a year ahead of where he should be and not disruptive to class.

We had our 2nd paediatric appointment on Tuesday and in his opinion DS has asd. He asked if we wanted to accept the formal diagnosis and only to make it official if we feel it would benifit DS.
I feel confused (I find it odd I get to choose).
DS doesn't need any extra help at school, so doesn't need funding.
As I understand from a parent point of view, diagnosis won't change anything - I just need to research and try different techniques with him.
Paediatrician said we would be offered genetic blood testing if we accepted diagnosis, but would I be able to do this privately if I wanted?

I don't want my son being labelled.
I don't want my decision to hinder him in the future (job applications, driving license, ability to travel, insurance).

I would appreciate people's opinion as I'm feeling so confused. I just want to do the right thing by him.

OP posts:
PolterGoose · 08/11/2015 19:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Iamverynotcrazy · 08/11/2015 19:18

He was in Raf he must have been lucky

PolterGoose · 08/11/2015 19:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

chocadd1ct · 08/11/2015 19:27

I don't think it affects travel visa. II have friends that were thinking about moving to Canada or Australia and an ASD dx apparently can be an obstacle. but really, how many people do you know, OP, who emigrated to these countries? this is probably a total non issue.

I really think you have got the priorities wrong.

If you have serious doubts could you go for a 2nd opinion?

madwomanbackintheattic · 08/11/2015 19:39

We emigrated. Have a child with cp and a child with ADHD w/ ASD traits. Still not entirely sure how we are here and could still go tits up.

Dx in service is completely different to having a Dx on application, notcrazy. I know a couple of people who are serving with one leg, but they wouldn't have been able to join with one missing.

However, I am mildly baffled by the genetic testing component. Your paed offered you genetic testing if you accepted an ASD Dx for your son? Eh?

Isn't that arse about face? Surely you test in order to provide information that aids dx?

MilkshakeMonkey · 09/11/2015 09:55

Some of you have made me feel awful.

I've just received my sons asd diagnosis from what I think (most agree) is a paediatrician who is not doing their job properly. Confused and trying to absorb the information I turned to this board. I just felt that I needed to be sure I was making the right decision (for now and my DS future) and thought talking to people who have asd children could help.
Me & DH have no real family support and I have no close friend with SN children to talk with.

OP posts:
PolterGoose · 09/11/2015 11:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Youarentkiddingme · 09/11/2015 12:19

In agree the intention certainly wasn't to make you feel awful. Flowers

Just to point out the positives of diagnosis vs the perceived negatives.

DobbinsVeil · 09/11/2015 13:12

Sorry MilkshakeMonkey. I've actually just looked up the thread I did when my DS1 was dx and I was a teary, shaky mess! He'd also had a very thorough multidisciplinary assessment and a year's worth of Salt observations and I was still bewildered and confused. I've also wondered whether his dx will be something he is angry at me doing when he is an adult, and there simply is no way of knowing.

If you're not happy the paediatrician is following the correct diagnostic procedure then it's understandable you have concerns. You could always tell the paediatrician you and your husband are at deadlock and need more time please pass us over. Although if you are only doubting the process rather than the dx, then accepting it now will save time (which could prove precious if there is a significant regression in behaviour).

2boysnamedR · 09/11/2015 15:50

I'm sorry if I've said anything to upset either. My comments come from what my pead told me. "Accept the Dx or we can look again in a few years" which translated to "never" for his brother.

Diagnosis shouldn't be a precursor for genetic testing. If a genetic problem was found then some times that is the primary Dx and asd would be a symptom kind of thing ( that's the case with one of my kids)

You absolutely don't have have to happy about the entire situation. If I had a choice I wouldn't be happy

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