REcommendation for Psychologist for anxiety re school

[LEAIssues]

HI.

Can anyone recommend a psychologist for an ASD teenager who has sensory processing disorder who is not going to school. School and LA professionals all saying that we should not let the child decide agenda and that he has to understand that the adults make decisions for him.

Any mention of his anxieties are met with solution of medication but I worry for his long-term mental health.

GP just saying to talk to school. Cahms psych say medicate and send him in.

I feel that with the backing of a psychologist, they might take his condition more seriously. We live in the Midlands but can travel to SE.

Hi LEAIssues, can't personally recommend as I am also looking for the same person as you. Our dd is twelve and has been out of school since Easter. This organisation came up on the NAS database when I had a look:

www.conatus.co.uk/

I have also contacted the NAS helpline; they were really helpful and emailed me details of others that didn't come up on the online database.

As to adults making decisions for him, the LA or the school have never obviously tried to force an ASD teen or near teen into school in the mornings. The lack of understanding is totally exasperating at times isn't it?

Dont have any advise re Psychologists but WTF!

Sorry but really! These people expect us to ruin our kids mental health for potentially tue rest of their lives and fir what! To squeeze them through a sausage factory where they end up with a few certificates (or not) and a breakdown!!

Jeeeze! I stopped forcing Dd3 to school in yr 6 and she carried on trying to attend until nearly the end of yr7 when I told her that she didnt have to go anymore if that was what she wanted!

She is now home ed and our lives have changed dramatically!

I know Home ed isnt for everyone but to be told you have to force your child to school everyday for yrs and yrs is soul destroying!

Be kind to yourself and good luck with finding a psychologist!

Oops lots of typos in there

Hi LEAIssues,

Can't help with a psychologist yet (but have just contacted one in SE for my DS). However the "force them into school as they are not adults" doesn't work. I tried this and the more pressure on DS, the worse he got. Not surprising really when it's anxiety based.

I long ago gave up the punitive approach recommended by some schools as DS wasn't choosing to not go in. He just couldn't do it. He has chronic pain, and in his case when he's under pressure to get in his body kind of shuts down so he cannot move. So far we've found nothing to help him override this reaction.

I see from your other thread that your DS is 14. Well that's certainly old enough to know his mind and resist parents pushing him into school where he feels he cannot cope. We used an online school for a while at this stage. Some children really like it but it didn't suit my DS. It's something you could look into though as they follow school subjects so it's easy to slot back into a (different) LA school later if needed. I know some posters on here have found online schools really helpful. For us it gave us a breathing space at a difficult time - dh was terminally ill and struggling with the previous unsupportive school fell off our agenda.

After his dad died, DS went back into a local school that was prepared to accept his issues were real. I can't say it was all brilliant but he did get in more for a while and achieved enough GCSEs to get on a college course .

I really hope things improve for you and your DS.

Thanks all.

I don't know how they think I am going to dress a 14 yo who is much bigger than me and force him into school. I did think of Home Educating, which I really think would benefit him until we find a suitable school somewhere. I'd have a look at online schools, it might give us a bit of space if the EWO came round - at least we can prove that he is being educated.

WaitingforSherlock - Will have a look at the list. I have been trying to contact the NAS helpline for days but the phone is always engaged.

Runningtokeepstill - So sorry to hear of your dh.

Is he on roll at a mainstream school, if he is then you can just de register him but you might be better to get your GP to sign him off sick for a while and see how it goes!

If you de register from a mainstream school the EWO wont come round and you dont have to prove anything to anyone! You do need to provide a suitable education for your ds but it doesnt have to be formal sit at the table learning!

I will try to link a website I have seen that explains the law around home ed!

Good luck

edyourself.org/

Thanks. Ineedmorepatience.

The local group looks interesting.

Will try to get the GP to sign him off first, as suggested.

I am not completely dismissing it. I would like them to properly assess my ds first, instead of hearing from others what they think the problem is. I would also like them to try other psycho-social interventions first, as recommended by the NICE guidelines. If all else fails, or if medication is recommended after a proper assessment, then of course we will do it.

No problem. I know you were being helpful and it is good to hear of other people's experiences with medication.