Screaming when she see's the spoon!

[Lakette]

Have posted on here a couple of times but sadly I am one of those mum's whose dd1 has no diagnosis so all seems a bit exhausting sometimes to explain what the problem is (and sometimes just seems to be too many!)
SHe is only 13 months old but so far issues include, not moving (crawling, wlaking, rolling etc) concerns over autism, epilepsy, very sensitive to noise, squawking .... god I could just go on and on!!
One of the main problems is eating - she looks very healthy (well looks fat anyway!) but never seems to be hungry - i dont think she understands that food equals filling her up (forgot to mention she never puts anything in her mouth) - Feeding is a real issue to the point now where she has whittled it down to just one meal that she will eat (chicken sweet potato and apple - annabel karmel !) and refuses to eat anything else - I look enviously at those mothers that can feed their baby from jars or give them bits of fruit/rice cakes/raisins to 'keep them happy!@
Tonight just got a bit overwhelmed by it all really - she even refused to eat fave dish and gets so hysterical even when she sees the spoon (hasnt even tasted the food!) Felt like it was me and she was picking up on my negative vibes but although she is better with the childminder apparetnly she feels like she is walking a tight rope as to whether my dd1 will eat or not
I guess question is any advise? This has been going on for about 4-5 months now so just need confidence that it wont go on for ever
I guess the main thing seems with her is that she is massively sensitive around her mouth area - Never just opens her mouth if I put anything near it - will lick with her tongue and then start screaming
Had to walk out of the room where she was hysterical tonight and leave her for 10 minutes to scream as she does get a bit much sometimes!

Poor you!!!

It must be as frustrating for you as it is for her.

I don't have any special needs experience, but i do have 3 children!!!

Has your Health Visitor or GP given you any suggestions?

This may sound mad, but will she lick things off your finger?

It may be a way round it for the short term.

Did you ever watch The House of Tiny Tearaways?

One week there was a girl with Downs and the parents were shown to put her in front of the mirror and to mimic each other and to make faces and have fun.

In turn, food was offered while in front of the mirror so that she could see what to do with it.

Eventually she would lick the food, and eventually she was sat eating a packet of skips on her own.

May be worth trying.

I feel awful that i can't offer much advice, but i hope someone can soon.

Good Luck

Can't offer any advice, but I am sure someone will be along soon.
It is hard sometimes, but it will get easier.
Just offering some support

Just thought I would bump this up as had a bit of a bad weekend with food and seeing if there is anyone else out there with any advice??

have you tried putting finger food out and removing the spoon?

Agree with Twiglett, try finger food and see how she gets on with that.

Will she eat yogurt, or fruit puree, or pieces of fruit?

I do sympathise, my DS3 who is being assessed at the moment is a very fussy eater.

Message withdrawn

My ds is 3.5 and ASD. We've had loads of problems with food from age of 1 to prob 2.5years. Nowadays he's a lot more tolerant and prepared to try many different things.
Ds1 would only eat a VERY soft diet. He was tube fed from birth for 4 weeks and everyone said it was because he was over sensitive to lumps. I think he was just over sensitive to food that didn't look right!! If he could see a lump he would reject it. I used to find this infuriating as I would spend hours thinking and lovingly preparing nutritionally balanced meals which would't even make it to the first mouth full! It used to end up in a battle and in the end we'd both be screaming!! I would kind of feel rejected by all this!!
In my situation I realised that I was getting much more wound up than he was and suddenly stopped putting pressure on him about eating at all. I decided to give the control back to him and if he refused at the first hurdle I would calmly take it away and try a freezer meal which was cheap and cheerful or weetabix with mashed banana or stewed apple which would pretty much always go down. If this too was rejected I would leave it and ds would have 2 or 3 yoghurts and that was it.
It only took a week or so and my relaxed approach must have relaxed him cos he started eating a few mouthfuls from my lovingly prepared dish and a year later he will a variety of foods. I used (and still do) make pasta sauces with all kinds of veg in but wizzed up so only I know they're there.
I'm pretty sure it was when I took the pressure of him he started to loose the panic and fear of eating and get a bit more adventurous.
He's still pinickety but I don't worry about his diet now.

I forgot to mention that all is not yet rosy. Finger foods are limited to rice cakes and chocolate. Nothing else will pass his lips. Havn't conquered this one yet!!!!

Sorry you are going through this - it is really cack and frustrating. I can empathise - my dd went through a stage of refusing her feeds and coughing every time something was put in her mouth. I got so down about it it got to the stage where my hands would be shaking each time I tried to feed her, she would refuse, I would force the spoon in her mouth, she would splutter, I would go out of the room and cry. it went on for months. At one point I got her ready in her car seat having decided I would leave her at the children's hospital where they'd managed to feed her so well - I obviously couldn't.

I really don't know what to suggest in the way of practical advice - only to relax (!) and try feeding from your finger. You say your dd is a good weight - please let that assure you that she must be getting what she needs. Don't be hard on yourself or her - you can only try. I know this is all easier said. With my dd things did just sort themselves out - she now eats great. In retrospect, I think she was aspirating her feeds and having hypoglycaemic episodes - both of which were making her not want to eat. Speak to your doctor about possible underlying medical concerns - and maybe a swallow study by Speach and Language may be of use. Take care

Thanks for all advice - I know that the more worked up I get about it the more she does too but you still cant help it sometimes - today she has gone back onto beef casserole (with peas!!!) and popeye pasta which added to the chicken dish is now 3 things that she will eat so I guess I shouldnt get that uptight about it
She wont actually eat anything 'finger food' wise and rather than open her mouth (apart from toast) she puts her tongue out to lick so i think it is more of a sensory thing - does make me laugh though sometimes as she is SUCH as dramaqueen with lots of gagging etc you would think i was making her eat brussel sprouts (even does it with chocolate!)
peadiatrician said not to worry at mo but have put a call into our SALT nevertheless to see if she has any tips - I think all the symptons are signs of ASD but as per usual answer is 'too young'!!