relocating to this area.. Not sure where exactly yet, looking at Milnathort, Perth, dollar . DH has his children up there and we would like to live close to them. Also love the place, DH from Scotland , visit every month, Have lovely friends up there and family. Love being close to Edinburgh and St. Andrews. Am self employed part time and I could work up there. Could get bigger house etc etc. fresh air etc etc
Have ds 9.
Diagnosed with high functioning autism at age 4 1/2 ... currently has a statement but I feel this is no longer a help to him or necessary. I feel it simply provides extra funding for his south of England state junior school ( mainstream ) I am seeking to have this removed as I feel it is now an unnecessary label and he doesn't like to be singled out. he doesn't spend time with a teaching assistant or like to leave the classroom. He told them 2 years ago he didn't want this anymore Thankyou.
His father and I were divorcing at the time of diagnosis... Home was a very stressful place for him ( sadly it was a domestic violence situation... Ex had mental health issues ) and we had to move and change schools a couple of times as a result. Ds and I talk quiet openly about it if he wants to. He doesn't have that much to do with his dad lately unless his uncle or grandmother are around as he had a relapse when he was staying with him
He really does seem to be .. not " growing out of his asd"... But really able to manage it and people do not notice anything different unless I mention it. He sort of does a mild version of many of the asd traits .. does tend to fixate a bit on favourite TV programmes for example and likes to secretly " stim " or relax at home with a bit of running up and down if he has had an " overload day" He is most conscientious about not doing this publicly and tries to remember to go use the trampoline. Likes to eat lunch at the same time each day etc etc. loves a good tight schedule.
Used to throw tantrums but hasn't for 2 or 3 years which makes me question how much was asd and how much was emotional distress. Having a great father figure in his step dad has made a huge difference.
Socialises well but not in large groups .. loves going to cubs, play dates, being with his step siblings (DSS 8, DSD 6) Very very Shy initially of strangers but covers it well . Good looking kid so this helps him I think.. He has learnt to be " cool" As a front. Unusually I think for somebody " on the spectrum" he has good empathy and is kind to other kids and people. Like other high functioning asd kids or adults I know.. Some generalisations for the bill and some don't.
A happy little boy nowadays , school reports are good for behaviour and "performance" ( I hate that word being applied to children.. Hate it) Scores highly in maths and science... Sending him for extra coaching with his handwriting as was told this was below standard for his age... Have seen huge improvements .. But still a way to go.
He does seem intimidated by a large busy school. A strongly competitive environment wouldn't work. He likes outdoor group activities but not into competitive sports.
I am looking for a good school for him ( as opposed to a good school if that makes sense ) I feel an independent school with smaller class sizes would be good and the fees are lower than in England so could afford it at a push.
Would he be able to get into an independent school in the area? Any that can be recommended? Before I start looking and applying should I seek to have the statement removed ? Is it recognised in Scotland. Would it help ?
Will he have to go through some dreadful interview where they are looking to see if he " acts different "??? Some stressful entrance exam ? He had a computerised mock assessment at a tutorial learning centre recently and they made it lots of fun so he was really relaxed... he came up with high scores . If the entrance was like that he would be fine. But being grilled by a stern headmaster?? He would go super shy. And then of course he wouldn't feel much like making eye contact. I don't think I would myself.
Or are there state schools anybody would recommend ? Class sizes are my only issue ... . He finds 30 kids in a classroom hard to concentrate because of the noise level and I can't say I blame him... So I want to get him away from that.
Would he be teased because of his accent ?
I got a perspectus from dollar academy. I mentioned he had been diagnosed asd and she said he would have to sit an entrance exam . Yet our friends whose daughters go there did not have to do this .
Any advice most gratefully received. I simply have no clue.
Sorry it's such a rambling email banging on about my kid. It's just that finding the right school,comes before finding the right home. And he has gone through so much upheaval.