Support in primary school

[anothernumberone]

Hi

Sorry this is long.

We strongly suspect our little man has ASD. He appears to be high functioning but things like independent toileting and dressing are still work in progress in preschool. He is sociable but likes to play alongside, rather than ever communicate verbally, with other children. He does not respond to his name if called and has a tendency to wander. (My primary school concerns). Academically he does not stay on task well.

I was speaking to our local assessment officer and it seems very unlikely that he will have a full assessment completed in time for his school applying for resources for next year (not UK so different system). His classroom will have approximately 25 children one teacher and one TA. In order for the school to get any specific resources for my child it is necessary for him to have an assessment completed and supplied to the school by March next year. The full assessment apparently takes months and he will not start his until close to February or later.

I spoke to the assessment officer about the possibility of a private assessment. The problem is that the state pay up to 2500 for the whole assessment process, 9-12 professional visits including preschool visits and home visits, whereas we can afford much less so our assessment is likely to be 'substandard' however we can probably get it done before March.

My question is will he manage for one year with the support of one teacher and one classroom assistant. It is not much different to his preschool set up but it is a longer day and I suspect they rely on children having much greater independence.

Does every child with ASD need their own specific assistant or assistance? Or should we get the lower cost assessment and try to get him his own support? If we take the private option he will not get the benefit of the state assessment as the private one will be the one used by the school.

I have until October to decide but I really have not got a clue.

So I suppose the question is wwyd?

Thx.

Any thoughts gratefully received.

Not every child with asd needs their own aide at school (where I live asd alone isn't enough to qualify for an individual aide but does give the child access to the school's general support for children with SN, so things like participating in suportedlunch time social games and occasionally getting time with the school's teaching aide). A diagnosis does, however, help the school work out if adjustments are needed to help the child learn and form relationships with peers. For example, my ds starts school in February and the school are looking at things like the chair he'll sit on, as he uses physical movement to help regulate his emotions. They are also avoiding putting ds in a class with job sharing teachers as that might be hard for him to deal with. So having the assessment before school would be helpful but if the school know it's coming they may be able to work with you before the official diagnosis happens.

Not knowing your countries set up I can't say for sure.

My son is totally non verbal but I have been told he would be ok in a reception class as like you say, it's mostly like preschool.

From what you say I would let your state sort it out. Your not gaining much time going private, the state will listen to their own report.

If you was in the uk I would say proceed with extreme caution as you would in all honestly probably be fobbed off with "let's wait and see" and months would turn into years with no assessment because their isn't the funding here

Good luck

Thanks a million for responding. I am really glad to read your replies.

olgrelt that is key to what I was wondering do all children with ASD need aides. Definitely if he needs one we will have a battle on our hands from what I have heard but I was wondering if in infants he would maybe get by without. Thanks for your views.

2boys
The country in Ireland and there is legislation that requires him to be assessed within the next 6 months but given the scale of the assessment process I have been told that in some instances it does get extended. The system is bizarre though in that the principal of the primary school has to apply for resource allocation in advance of the new school year and there is no scope for more during the year apparently. My gut has been saying wait on the state one because I would rather spend whatever money we have to on intervention at the other end. thx again for your response. I am totally at see with it all.

I don't know Ireland laws but I suspect it's not greatly dissimilar.

No not all kids with ASD even need statements, ehcps so it follows that that they don't need a 1:1.

But they should be on the school sen register and have a pathway plan ( in England)

I think I would wait and see but in the meantime build up a case. Don't talk to school without backing it all up with a email 'so you told me today that I will have a assesment by Feb, I look forward to hearing the outcome' so you have a paper trail if it goes wrong.

It avoids all the " we never said feb, you must have misheard me"

Brilliant 2 boys I will keep that in mind.

I think he will actually be fine until he moves out of the first year as he is actually an incredibly placid child but he is developmentally behind so it is the basics of toileting, dressing and just 'getting/understanding' what is required of him that are going to be the most difficult. He rarely melts down (definitely his father's disposition) but is very sensory seeking so when he is restricted in school in terms of class work that might change. He can be aggressive which is also a concern.

I have two kids with sen. The eldest is placid and polite. The youngest is feisty, firey and non verbal. I'm not worried if he ends up in MS with zero help - because school will soon realise they can't cope with him. If school ask for help it's normally faster. I have been appealing for three years and still have not much to show for it. I doubt the same school will be happy to be hit and change my younger boys bum for there years!

I think that you should be hopeful but cautious. Build up a plan b just in case you need it

It is frustrating 2boys I have been hearing a fair bit about having to fight for things, it makes me nervous. We both work FT too, which obviously is not great and we might have to look at some changes to that to make time to plan and push things along.

We have a bizarre system here where the equivalent of the NHS do the assessment and the schools then get it. Then, and this is where bizarre meets ridiculous, the school apparently has one opportunity in March to get their resources in place for the next year, before they even take in the students if you consider our version of reception. So I have been told anyway.

I get what you are saying about the quieter children missing out that could be a very real worry for us too. DS is a very easy going boy so it might be a bit easy for him to slip through like your older boy. My older daughter has dyslexia and a version of SPD akin to dyspraxia, but she was a total different kettle of fish so it is all new to me in spite of our previous experience since they are so different a bit like your boys.

It is good to hear others experiences, even in the different system, more seems to apply that does not. So far I have only spoken to one mum here whose son has ASD, the others I have been chatting too all have difficulties more similar to dds.

My older boy is dyspraxic, younger one has asd.

I have four kids and up till I had my youngest I also had a challenging job. I'm on a career break right now as too many balls to juggle. I found work a nice escape but was PT as lots of meetings and appointments.

Just take it a day at a time ( I'm guilty of not following my own advice!) I do see other parents in my county get great outcomes when they don't cross the LA. Key being not to upset the LA!

With my older boy I had no choices left open but appeal. My back was against the wall and I seriously believe I had no other choice. But my younger boy was placed in a asd nursery really without any input from me. I said to his portage and early support worker that I wasn't fighting his corner, so they did.

You will know what to do at the time. But like I saw get a insurance plan b together. Let's hope you never need it

Fingers crossed I don't 2boys i have 3 children. Juggling balls all the way in this house at the moment. I was saying to dh recently we won't be able to continue as we were there is just going to be too much to contend with.

Yes it's hard. You get pulled in all directions until your paper thin. I left all balls drop after I had my baby (12 months old now). It's good getting to stage where you can think "stuff it, I'm done with this" luckily or ironically I'm no worse off not working so I'm just checking out of reality for a year or so.

I was a control freak, I'm not missing that. Maybe if things get too much you could ask for your unpaid parental leave? I was considering that when my youngest was 18 months old.

Nothing has to be final.

I'm having a bad time now because I have a statement appeal next month. But mostly we're happy. Mostly life is fine. I do worry a lot but both boys are happy. My two other kids need and deserve a happy childhood and I deserve to enjoy all of my wacky kids. Things do fall into place, sometimes they need a good nudge from us.

Work will always be there but your sanity is just as important.

We have the complication that I am the higher earner so the best I can hope for is to use some not all parental leave. I am lucky though I get about 15 weeks holidays so it definitely could be a lot worse and dh is very flexible as he runs his own business so he has stepped in to get ds to preschool. Dd is unbelievably independent and confident but you know yourself it does not make me feel better as I feel she misses out. Dd2 is the real loser though, we find we have to specifically make an effort for her because otherwise she gets lost between the other two. Gah who am I telling it is just pandamonimum at times. I can tell you get it .