do you ever feel your other dc's get over looked

[2Shoes]

and that people see you just as an sn parent/carer?

Yeah, all the time. And that they don't have anyone to talk to about it who can relate. Really feeling this atm as have very sad angry older ds. I'm going out(!)now for a couple of hours, but would like to chat more.

yep. In lots of ways. Weird thing is almost everyone on our street knows ds1 by name (partly because he's always trying to look in their houses), very few know the names of ds2 or ds3.

Find it very hard to balance everyones needs.

Me too. Constantly yo-yoing between the two of them feeling guilty about both.

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once i toook dd and ds to where dh was working. big fuss made of dd(in her wheelchair) ds sudenly said. hello Iam here.
says it all really.
often i look back and think of all the missed visits to the park. as I never wanted to take dd(torture for her sitting in a wheelchair watching other kids running arround) strange how friends never thought to take him.
moral of the story if you know someone who has an sn and nt children PLEASE offer to take there nt child with you when you visit the park

For me I feel as though I expect more of dd2 at times as she seems more capable than dd1 sometimes and I have to stop and remember she is only 2 ( well next week anyway) I used to feel bad that as a baby - she was dragged to therapy, playgroup, hospital appts and very rarely got one to one attention. Nos that dd1 is in kindy she is getting more of my time and I signed her up for swimming lessons - which at this time means mummy gets in too - just so she had something that was hers iyswim.

yes.

DD had a small delay in her speech, she just wasn't speaking until she hit 2.
i wasn't overly worried and firmly believed in the "wait and see" camp.

but there was a toddler group that was specifically run to aid SAL. trouble was it was in the afternoon and cut right across when i had to collect DS early from school so she couldn't go.

i was really cut up that DD may possibly have a real problem and she is being overlooked because of DS. thankfully she is now catching up fast and doesn't stop yacking all day lol but she still misses out on a lot because of DS....the worst is to come though.

she is due to start nursary next september, i am having to choose between two not so great nursaries because they are closest tp ds's school and i need to be close to him in order to collect him if i need to.

i am so ashamed to have to say that but its logistics of having to care for DS that will mean that DD doesn;t get the best education...i am convicing myself that she is such an intelligant girl that she will excell wherever she goes but i am really about it.

Both my kids have special needs. My youngest has autism and is non verbal and my oldest has adhd. I have been feeling upset lately as i feel im having to leave ds2 out of things as he cant cope. Especially coming up to Christmas and theres things on. I know the question is does your other children get overlooked but i can only answer it from the point of view of someone who doesnt have any nt children. In my case its either go to places i know ds2 could cope with (which isnt many tbh), or just take ds1 as ds2 cant cope and there`d be meltdowns etc. I remember taking them both to Santa for a present but i cant see that happening this year. I will probably take ds1 as i dont want him to miss out but ds2 hates strangers and would get reallly upset as this happened last year before the diagnosis. Im always worrying now about putting ds2 in upsetting situations. So i guess in some ways ds1 gets overlooked and he has his own problems as well.

Oh God Yes!

ATM, DS1 has ASD (HFA), and DS3 is just enteri9ngt he referral process, he needs lots of attention- has lost bladder control, has very few words, etc. In the middle is ds2- NT as they come. Poor, poor lad!