Managing Aspergers 'tics'

[SerJorahsSecondChoice]

I'm sorry if that's the wrong word, but this is my first post on this board.

I have a (just turned) 3yo ds who is the apple of my eye. For about 6 months or so dh and I have been thinking that he has Aspergers. Actually, we're pretty certain - some days more than others.

Obviously we have a lot going on in our minds about this but the one that's saddening me the most is that he is developing quite a few tics. Since he was about 6mo he has been doing the extreme flappy hands thing whenever he is excited (even if he's only a little bit excited). He can't seem to control this. He also bounces constantly - I've tried to stop him (we live in a flat, so bouncing isn't good for neighbourly relations) but he doesn't seem able to stop. He says 'but I like bouncing, mummy,' yet it seems very subconscious.

In the last few weeks he's developed a few new tics/ mannerisms. He keeps poking his tongue out in a weird way - hard to describe but almost like he's about to lick an invisible ice cream. He does this when he's scared or surprised or anxious, or when he's excited. He's also started lurching forward when he's excited, like he's trying to propel himself forwards. Both mannerisms are very constant.

This evening he was watching some nursery rhymes, which he loves, and was doing all these things so repeatedly it made me see for the first time the potential for other people to see him as a bit odd. Breaks my heart - he's not odd. But I could see a lifetime of people staring at him and him being isolated and my dh and I don't know what to do. Should we try and stop these tics? Can we stop them? Is it wrong to stop them? I feel it would be like asking him to stop breathing. I hear myself saying 'stop bouncing' all the time and hate the thought that he might look back and see me always, always telling him to stop doing things that come naturally to him. I just don't know what to do for the best, the best for him now and in the future.

Have you spoken to your GP re: getting him assessed?

The "tics" - these are his way of managing stress/anxiety. When he is less stressed, they should be less prevalent.

However what is wrong with being "odd"? If he is on the Autism spectrum he is not going to be "just like everyone else", but then again that is boring.

If bouncing is a real problem, then try altering the movement, maybe spinning on an office chair?

Lots of children/people have "tics", I sometime poke my tongue out when concentrating, lots of people bite their nails, lots of children such their thumbs.

My ds was like this at 3 until around 5. He still has tics now at 8 but has learnt to control them better. Eg rather than a full on flap he now twists his arms / hands so it's less obvious. Lots of children have tics at that age and totally grow out of them though. Is there anything else that is pointing you towards autism? Unless he is very severe he's quite young to get assessed I should think.