Can see this ending badly.

[xenzani]

Dd2 who is almost 9 is in a PRU because of her behaviour. She has an ADOS assessment in two weeks, is controlling, has issues with music, possibly some ADHD traits, can get vety anxious, was school refusing etc.

Monday's, her class at the pru go and do gymnastics. All was good until they put music on after the session started. Normally the music is already playing but not today so they put it on after thr session had started, cue huge tantrum. They turned it off and all was okay. She would have been on edge afterwards. Two boys in her class started winding her up disagreeing with her wrt true facts. Drive back to the school and she couldn't sit where she sat on the way to gymnastics, cue huge meltdown requiring her to be restrained as she was kicking, hitting and spitting.

I go pick her up from the unit as usual, she does three hours a day. I get her calm enough to go home amd then she realised her ponies (my little pony obsession) were still in the class so we go back. Two boys in her class were laughing at her through the window and it set her off again. she didn't calm down but a third boy in her class got her her ponies. Head of the primary section was getting angry with dd even though she was not involved or at the gym session.

Anyway, had a phone call a few minutes ago and basically dd won't be going gymnastics again and will be going 9-11 for the rest of the week.

She is now statemented and one of the recommendations are that everyone working with her is to stay calm and show no frustration with her which most of the staff managed to do, except the head of the primary section did not do.

Dd has said she won't go back there but once calmed said she would. Now with the cut in hours this week and no more gymnastics, she will be upset and probably will refuse to go in again.

I'm worried things will go back to jow they were and Monday's will be a nightmare. Things had been going really well and now this.

Totally agree with polter

I'm so sorry this is happening. Can you contact local parent partnership to support you?

You would think three members of the unit staff plus the instructor would be enough for 4 to 5 children.

Things shouldn't have gone as far as they did, if she had calmly said about the music instead of going full blown 'tantrum' as they called it, I say very slight routine change causing her to have a meltdown, she can be very sensitive to routine changes. They make adjustments a lot for her with music and their weekly music lessons and she knows that if she is calm and asks for the music to be turned off then most likely they will.

I wished they would get that if she is trying to appear to be controlling, then her anxiety levels are rising and she is struggling to cope. I do agree that she couldn't sit where she wanted on the mini bus back to the unit, they do things fairly for all the children and lots of compromising is done. With her already on the edge it just sent her spiralling. She has to apologise today and then it will all be forgotten about...until the next gymnastics session and she can't go. I do hope they give her another chance with that.

It must surely be the wrong place for her if they can only cope with her on such a part time timetable? If it has to be so part time then why is gymnastics, which she struggles with, such a major part of it? Why can't she go a different 2 hours on Mondays?

It's unlawful to cut down her hours like that. Contact them and say that if they aren't doing a formal exclusion she is going to be coming in full time. Also point out that excluding her from gymnastics is discrimination against her based on her disability and that also is unlawful.

And start looking for a school that actually knows what it is doing with children with probable autism. It is not appropriate to shove statemented children into PRUs indefinitely.

With regards to hours, they tend to start them on two hours gradually building up to five hours a day, space depending. She went up to three hours and possibly would have gone four if they had the space in her class. When ready, the children in her class, move up to the other class if there is a space. Three hours are her normal hours, this week she's doing two a day which does come across as an exclusion.

Gymnastics isn't normally an issue, she actually loves going and is good at it. It's just yesterday where the music wasn't already on and switched on after starting the session, the boys winding her up and her being more on edge. I do think she would have blown where ever she was, it just would have been different triggers.

Spoke to the head of the primary section this morning, mentioned that dd is ticcing like crazy, had been for a week or so now, has started chewing her hair again and that she does these more when anxious. I get what she is saying that dd can't behave like that and told her that dd needs help to prevent it getting that far.

As for moving her out of there, I wouldn't know how to go about it tbh. They tend to wait until the child is ready to move on, in their eyes, she isn't.

Other's will be able to answer this but doesn't she have a right to full time education? It is not good enough to just say they only have space for two or three hours a day. Also, it very much sounds like the PRU is not meeting her needs. I presume "move on" means back to mainstream? Mainstream might just not be right for her. It might be worthwhile investigating Units or SS in your area to see if any of them would offer a better fit. She is not going to learn if her learning environment sends her anxiety rocketing.

Absolutely with Bil on this one.

Your dc is entitled to full time education that meets her needs. What she has is non-full time education and it doesn't meet her needs. Have you looked at special schools?

It sounds to me as though the ADOS assessment couldn't come soon enough, but you could also have a look at Polter's sensory thread and see if there are any sensory issues that ring a bell.

The devotion to routine fits with ASD/C and PDA but also with a way of dealing with stress caused by unmet sensory needs. The obsession with my little pony looks like ASD/C but again may be anxiety driven, I guess (I'm an amateur)

Polter is like a one-goose library for these things if you want any more info, but you may have thought about these possible reasons already.

Have you had an assessment from a sensory OT? or SALT?

In my head is something a good EP told me ages ago which is that the techniques used for behaviour issues, ie pre-meditated disruptive behaviour is not at all the type of intervention that would work for a sensory overload type meltdown for a child with ASD/C or sensory issues. So I am passin that on in case it helps

Of course she's entitled to full time education as a matter of law.

Does the statement name the PRU in part 4? I would suggest you get advice from someone like SOS SEN, because obviously if they can't offer full time education they aren't meeting her needs and they really to need to name another school, possibly a special school. What really bothers me about the current situation is that it's in danger of becoming a vicious circle: the more anxious she get, the more they say she's not ready to move on, the more anxious she gets. The trouble is that they're being far too inflexible and assuming that the only alternative is a move back to mainstream, which isn't necessarily at all appropriate.