Aspergers and playdates

[everyusernameisinuse]

Really worried about DS, age 5, ending up lonely

I notice lots of children in his class go on playdates after school with each other. DS has never been invited. I'm not sure how he comes across to the other children. He can be very engaged at times but also zones out if disinterested and has tantrums at times. Tantrums are not too bad though but obviously not really appropriate for his age.

I did arrange one play date but I was wondering if the other mum just said yes to be polite - and that maybe she wished I'd leave her alone so her son could spend time with more social children.

I'm afraid to ask others. I don't have much confidence myself anyway and DS's issues make me even less confident

Is meeting up with other children with Aspergers from outside the class a good idea or not. I'm wondering if they'll just ignore each other and get no benefit?

Some ASD kids get on better with younger kids, or maybe with an older kid or adult who can run with a special interest.

But if dc likes to have another kid over, then fine, ask. Also it may work better if you can manage to plan an activity that will be fun whether there is much interaction of not, like trip to a farm or something.

To give you an idea from the mainstream parents' perspective and lots of ideas have a look at this thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/2318344-DSs-birthday-party-child-with-ADHD-attending-and-Im-nervous

what about joining clubs or organised activities after school. It is a good way for your ds to socialise but in a structured way and you will also get to meet other parents at pick up , drop off and/or waiting around. My ds goes to a sports equality class and also a mainstream club.

My ds has a couple of friends who have a diagnosis of AS. My ds has a diagnosis of HFA. They all get on well and have fun when we meet up at park or soft play. I find it harder to socialise with the parents of ds' nt friends.