Don't now if it's ASD or just part of ds LD

[Hedgyhoggy]

Ds has moderate ld, he is 5 1/2 and previously I've always said he has not got ASD, he has good eye contact, and I've always thought his social skills are quite good. However, we've just had a terrible weekend and I'm doubting my judgement. It's not exactly routines that he likes but he is happier in environments he knows (home, school) asks to go home even when he's there. Calls everyone 'pain' all the time, sometime in a happy way other times in a tone which suggests they are upsetting him. Going out is a nightmare, took him to the toy shop yesterday he refused to go in (which was fine, only thought he would like to) then he saw muffin cafe and wanted to go, but it was full so I told him we would go to the bakery, massive meltdown, kicking, screaming,pulling my hair, hitting me. Could not calm him down. This happens frequently. He is very defiant, runs off when we are out. Screams and cries ( in a strange kind of forced way) all the time. Brother only has to glance at his ipad and he cries and hits out. Very poor at entertaining himself. There are loads of other things that are quite difficult about his behaviour but I'm not sure whether it's frustration because of not understanding the world he's in or is it just the slightly autistic traits of his developmental level? He is also a very adorable little boy who is very loving and really wants friends. Has anybody any thoughts?

Sounds like my son with asd - he also wants to 'go home' and going out is a nightmare. We don't take him to family events where there will be more than 6 people as he just can't cope.

When we do take him out I just put on my 'oblivious face' but I know heads are turning and eyes staring because of the crying noise my son makes. He also descends very quickly into hitting and kicking when something goes wrong.

My son can also be very loving and his eye contact isn't too bad (made no eye contact at age 2-3 yrs, but really improved age 4). He is also 5 yrs old like your DS.

Don't know if that's any help - does your son have an involved professional you could talk your thoughts through with?

Thanks for replying Andanotherthing. He's ok at family parties and we can go to soft play but he does start to ask to go home if it gets too busy and I can't trust him not to hit out at others when he gets like that. He's a bit of an enigma to me, he will be fine in a busy swimming pool ( he loves swimming) but will not cope with a disco at a party even though he loves listening to music at home. Supermarkets are a no go!

He has quite a lot of involvement from paed, salt, physio, Cahms and statemented but I think they've just believed me when I've said he hasn't got ASD. Even if he's spent the whole session trying to escape.

Do you mind me asking if your ds has a ld as well?

Anymore thoughts anyone.

Hi OP.

It's difficult to say whether he has ASD as the spectrum is so broad. My DS has ASD and has very good eye contact and sociable.

I don't know much about learning difficulties, so can't help that much in that area.

I think if your really concern then I'll
Strongly advice that you see a developmental paediatrician.

I can't really advice but I'm very similar with my ds. He is diagnosed with developmental delay and learning difficulties already. He is the same age as your ds and we're waiting for asd assessment.

I found I also wasn't sure if ds was just showing asd traits due to learning difficulties too and his symptoms were complicated by a seizure disorder too.

Eventually I compiled a list of the behaviours that I felt fell into the triad of impairments and took it to the next paed appointment. She referred for assessment and I really didn't think she would.

I think the thing was for me when I compared ds to other asd children he seemed very different to them, but when I looked at him directly next to the diagnostic criteria he just fitted it.

I totally know what you mean about your ds being an enigma and being affected by somethings and not others. I think that's due to sensory issues affecting them in very different ways.

I would say if you think he should be assessed for asd tell them, it's likely to be a long wait anyway, we've already been waiting a year!

I think that co-morbids always confuse how ASD presents. I have two with ASD - one with no LDs but with ADHD and one with LDs. My DS with LDs is a lot more even tempered, to the point of being quite sunny, apart from odd moments when his world falls apart (some of those moments are rather prolonged, admittedly). The things that make his world fall apart are absolutely consistent with ASD rigidity. My other boy - at the other end of the intelligence spectrum - is often angry and can be very miserable with his lot. He's the one with the massive public meltdowns and the one who as always struggled with mainstream education and went into a specialist school in year 5. I started that process in year 4. DS2 is at the same point in year 4, now and is absolutely loving it. Other children adore him and their attention usually makes him happy. Red noses have passed him by, in previous years, but he's noticed them, this time, and thinks they are hilarious!

Sorry for the delayed reply to your question Hedgyhoggy - weirdly, we have the reverse situation to you in that DS got an ASD diagnosis when he was two and it was very conclusive...but DH and I have often wondered if he has LD as well and have toyed with the idea of talking to the paed about it.

DS goes to an MLD school which has lots of kids with asd and/or LD. One thing that always strikes me is how different to each other all the kids are - my DS is less stimmy than some, but more rigid and volatile than others. His language skills are better than most of his peers but he performs at a lower standard academically. It's bloody confusing!