school has raised some issues

[sliceofsoup]

I have a thread in chat here but I really need some more opinions.

I am going to go to the GP asap, but for my own sanity I need to feel more clued up.

I don't even know where to start. :(

Hi there, I see you mentioned seeing the school nurse before. Could you approach them for some observation to be done in class and get something in writing from them? Or could you approach the school SENCO yourself?

I think the teacher is mentioning the waiting until next year blah blah because that's how dyslexia is dealt with, they won't usually consider it until they are in year three (assuming by your DDs age she's in year two?) but as you say, it does sound more than dyslexia, and noticing fairly rapid changes too, I too would want action now, even if that's being on a waiting list to see someone.

Unfortunately none of these things like dyslexia, dyspraxia, ASD etc seem to move quick, and are very very long drawn out processes to get to diagnosis stage. So, the quicker you can get a foot in the door so to speak, the better in my opinion.

At the end of the day, you know her best and you need to trust your gut to a certain extent in my experience. Basically, don't let them tell you no until you've explored every avenue available now. Write down what you and the people closest to her see as the issues that need looking at, take it with you to gp. Perhaps even book a double appointment if you can, as it will take some time to go through everything and if they can and will refer you, you need the referral to be as compressive as possible to get in the door to be seen. Good luck!

Thank you. We are in N.Ireland, so she is in P2 which I think is Y1 in England.

I have no idea who the SENCO is or how to go about approaching them myself, or indeed the school nurse. I think I would have to go through the school to speak to them.

There is a teacher in the school with her own room, who provides support to what seems like a lot of pupils, at pick up times there are children going in and out. The teacher said she will talk to this lady now to get her opinion, so maybe in a week or so I could ask for an update on whether she has spoken to her or not.

Then I was thinking, perhaps the teacher is trying a gently gently approach, informing me of the issue and waiting for me to take it on board and then push for more involvement? Or is that far fetched?

My plan atm is to go to the GP and then if they need something in writing from the school, approach the school and ask. I will go back and forward as many times as it takes. I just got the feeling from the teacher that she is reluctant to do anything at this stage.

The school scored Good at their last assessment, and they seem fairly up to speed on many issues. Her P1 teacher was fantastic, as is her current teacher, so I do trust their opinion, but then they don't see her at home, so perhaps don't realise the extent of her disorganisation. And of course don't see the more negative aspects of her behaviour like the impulsiveness, her deceptiveness or the way she seems hell bent to break the rules she knows are there.

She has written all over her bedroom walls, destroyed books, thrown things out the window, taken my moisturizer and make up and plastered it all over the carpet, she steals food too. We seem to have this all under control at the minute, but it comes in waves, and every time we reach the end of our tether and think there must be more to it, it all calms down and I then think its not so bad.

I don't know what is normal and what is not. She is so reasonable, she knows the rules, she understands everything. Her mind is so quick and she has a big imagination, but when it comes to very basic things I think a 6yo should know not to do, she does them. Its like she can't help herself.

Sounds like the teacher is giving you a heads up to get a referral to CAMHS- or I'd suggest you take it as that. A child's life isn't just about school, and nobody needs their say so to get into the healthcare system.

After a year fannying about - and 8 years of my DSs life knowing there was an issue, we've finally got a diagnosis of ADHD.

Your DD sound like she has some stuff going on - stuff that's affecting your home life. That's good enough for me when it comes to asking for help. What I have learnt: never turn down an offer of a referral to something that our wonderful Nhs provides for free.
Ring your go and ask for a phone appointment. Explain that you have some behaviour concerns (writing a summary to give helps) and that you want to chat before you bring DD in. Hopefully your GP will take it from here. Clearly ask for a referral to CAMHS

Does your school have a website? The details of staff like who is the SENCO should be readily available and you shouldn't have to approach the teacher etc. school nurses here are more part of GP type service, but again all should be available online through Google for your area.

I hope you don't have to battle too hard to get somewhere.

Does the GP need to see DD to refer? She is generally very well behaved in public and I don't think the GP would see anything in the appointment. (Again why I keep thinking its not so bad as to need external help.)

At what stage do I need to tell DD? How do I tell her?

So I need to ask for a referral to CAMHS for the behaviour at home, does that cover the school side too?

Yes it does but Health service is for whole child and SENCo is about education specifically.

Write down what she does because it IS important if she's behaving like that in private. A proper summary is a document in itself. You will see on this board how many children 'mask' at school and out of the home. A teacher has clocked your child, and you yourself have noticed this so I'd say it's happening in two settings to the GP.

The teacher has only clocked the extreme disorganisation, and is happy with her behaviour generally.

DD doesn't have a simple life. She struggles with the transition between here and her dads. Although she is happy in both places. I had severe PND for a year, I feel guilty that during that time I was very emotionally unavailable. As it stands, she has her feet in two houses, she has a sister here, and a step dad, and I worry sometimes that she feels disconnected from us.

I am reluctant to have her home life translated into a problem with her. Does that make sense? But we do need help, if only to set in place some strategies to help her cope with things.

Had a look at the schools website, no info regarding SENCO. Will have a google now, maybe there is info on the DOEs site.

Hi slice I commented on your other thread!
Regarding physio and OT they would assess things such as coordination, muscle tone, core strength, balance etc.
You mention that your dd is slightly hypermobile. This could cause pain and fatigue when writing/ colouring, has she ever complained of this?

Disorganisation is also closely associated with dyspraxia. My dd is dyspraxic and finds it very difficult to sequence events, is very messy, always losing things, accidentally dropping things etc. She struggles to remember to take her book out of her bag in school etc, loses her place when reading and is very clumsy.

Good luck with going to the GP. You don't have to take dd with you, although they might want to see her before they refer.

Also regarding your dd's behaviour have you ever considered that she may have sensory processing difficulties? The drawing on the walls, smearing make up into carpets and throwing things from windows could indicate that she is seeking additional sensory input. Does she seem to move alot, be quite fidgety? Does she like to play with water and make a lot of mess? touch everything when out and about? like jumping? seem to like falling? watching things fall/ move? taking unnecessary risks such as jumping from high walls etc?

Does she seem to move alot, be quite fidgety? Does she like to play with water and make a lot of mess? touch everything when out and about? like jumping? seem to like falling? watching things fall/ move? taking unnecessary risks such as jumping from high walls etc?

Yes, she is very fidgety, always moving, I have her in a dance class to try to channel that and give her an outlet for it. She also makes noise a lot. If she isn't talking she is singing or humming or making any noise she can. Though that comes in waves as well, and sometimes it is worse than others. She touches everything, likes to get messy, LOVES the bath, she would sit in it all day if we let her. She climbs to the top of the sofas, and onto her windowsill. I haven't noticed that so much when at the park, but then shes distracted with all the equipment anyway.

She has never complained about fatigue from writing or colouring, and she loves to do both. But some days it does feel like school really drains her, and I have to make her take a nap when she gets home.

Regarding additional sensory input, what does that involve? Should I try to help her now or wait until she is assessed? The last thing I want to do is mask her issues more before she has the support she needs.

I have a GP appointment booked for early next week. Any pointers as to how I approach this? Outline the behaviours at home? Or focus more on what the teacher has said?

What am I pushing for? A referral to CAMHS? Pediatrician?

Does this help?

www.sompar.nhs.uk/content/26210/33259/Fact_File_for_School_Age_-FINAL%282%29_111012.pdf

Thanks, I have had a quick look. On the face of it she has met all the milestones. But some of the observations are applicable to DD.

I am not talking from any experience of knowledge or experience, bar a few months of speech therapy for DS (who clammed up totally at each appointment - not useful). Speech therapist suggested I video'd the issues at home to she her. Duly did. DS opened up and we started to make progress.

It may well be the last thing on your mind if your DD starts to have a meltdown at home - but may help you show the professionals what she is like in her home environment.