Help! Poo eating

[HugAndRoll]

I haven't posted for a long time, and I'm sorry my first post on my return to the world of Mumsnet is a plea for help.

My DS1 is 7 in April, diagnosed HFA, hypermobile, hypotonic, with sensory seeking behaviours. He's under a paediatrician, however SALT, OT and physio have all discharged him. (He's waiting to be re-referred to SALT as his speech is still behind for his age)

I spoke to his OT about 3 weeks ago, at this point I only knew of DS1 sticking his fingers up his bottom, pooing into his hand, never wiping after pooing, not washing his hands (I know this is quite typical but I'm listing it anyway), still wetting often and so on. (He also still can't use cutlery properly, will eat with his hands, including cereal and things like jelly, and definitely can't cut things up. He still struggles with dressing and fastenings). I was told that he'd been on an intensive course, there was nothing more they could do for him, that he has a special chair for school and that's it, I have to take ownership of it all myself and they are discharging him.

Today, twice I saw him with his fingers up his bottom, I told him to get them out (as I was walking over to him) and he did and put his fingers straight into his mouth. I whipped them out as quickly as I could and said that he could get poorly if he does that. We then went to the bathroom for cleanup and poo on the toilet attempt.

I've asked why he does it, he says it's to "feel it". I asked if he knows when he needs a poo, he says no. I asked if he likes it, he also said no to that (but his behaviour says otherwise).

Oh wise Mumsnetters, please say you have some suggestions. I've had some from a wonderful local autism charity but all suggestions are very welcome. His ASD behaviours are more pronounced this week due to half term, but this is the one which I need to focus on first.

Bumping for the evening.

I heard of a case a bit like this where increasing messy play was suggested, but that was for a child who wanted to feel lots of things all the time.

Another mum said that she stopped it by some very clear pictures around the toilet and elsewhere as needed.

In both situations the knack seemed to be understanding the 'why'. If there is a genuine interest in what it feels like followed by a desire to stop it being stuck to his fingers, then that is very different to the two kids I have heard of.

I wish I could be more help...

It's been suggested that I do something similar to that Polter, but he leaves going for a wee so late (or doesn't go at all) I think it'll result in more wet floors/pants etc. Maybe it'll be better than the alternative.

I still have to wipe him as he just can't do it himself. This is all prior to pooing (or during). He doesn't go to the toilet unless I tell him to around 80% of the time. The other 20% he's pooing into his hand on his way to the toilet.

I will keep on going with the why as I know that'll be the key to cracking this (no pun intended).

I heard a special school sorts this by taking the child every eg 30 minutes and massive praise for success and parents/carer taking careful notes of when dc goes. In that school, exercise and food was on a pretty tight timetable which helped reduce the variables.

Then it was extending the the time until it was about right together with noting eg evry 30 mins after a drink etc. Your dc sound like every 30 mins would be too short, as he is further ahead.

The other thing that occurred to me, just on the off chance it helps, is that if he is seeking either the feeling or taste in his mouth rather than on his hands then the sensory system might need more challenging with tastes than messy play with hands.

Good Luck

Thank you senvet. He's got HFA and is mainstream school with no statement (just IEP+). I am going to look into your ideas more, try and get him back on board with an OT and have a meeting with school to see if there's anything they can do to assist.

He just did it again and I did some bad parenting. I said it's dangerous and he could die from doing it. I feel awful (although it's not untrue as if he contracts E-Coli from it, he could be seriously ill). He wasn't even that bothered by me saying that, although it could come out in anxieties later.

Saying it is dangerous when it is dangerous is good parenting.

I expect Polter's info might ring bells for you, as that special school doesn't sound like a match for your dc. They are used to starting from a different baseline I think

I'm surprised ot discharged you. How good are they? Can you phone your ot up for some advise? My ot team are life savers but I know I have been lucky as they are very over streached but will not discharge my son thank god.

What about a social story??

Thank you everyone.

Polter I do remember the sheets, I still have them somewhere (I've moved since then but I know I have them!)

2boys He has a special chair from them in school, they taught the TA what to do with it and discharged him after delivery. I didn't really get a say in it! I really wish they hadn't as he still has problems generally, sensory and practical.

Pootrouble (apt NN) I will try a social story with him. He has toileting instructions in a sort of visual timetable, but it's worth trying anything.

I'm taking him to the GP tomorrow as his eczema is currently quite bad, I'll mention it there as well as his paediatrician knowing. He still wets the bed (through pullups) so he has a broad range of toileting issues (and I have mountains of washing ).

I know I'm late to this thread (again).

My DS3 was quite interested in touching his bottom at one point. He used to do it fairly absentmindedly whilst watching TV. I ended up making him wear a leotard under his clothes so that he couldn't get to his bottom. (He could have if he really tried obviously - but he didn't ). It worked well to break the habit. Eventually I used to use it as a threat, as in, you know you'll have to wear the leotard if you touch your bottom etc.

Hope I don't sound awful. It was helpful that the behaviour only happened at specific times so ds3 only wore the leotard for a relatively short time every day.

I seem to remember that leotards are bloody expensive though. Ds1 & 2 thought I was mean - but it worked.

It may be worth a go stillstanding, my only hesitation is it's almost constant and he'd really struggle with going to the toilet.

We went to the GP today, they've said it has to go through his paediatrician, but they will chase too.

It may be worth a go stillstanding, my only hesitation is it's almost constant and he'd really struggle with going to the toilet.

We went to the GP today, they've said it has to go through his paediatrician, but they will chase too.

Ds used to do this (occasionally still does) and in retrospect I think it was to feel if anything was coming so to speak. (Sorry if TMI). He did
not pick up family and societal aversion to touching poo as other children do! Also he used to get itchy as he could not wipe himself properly when at school. He still does not have good awareness of his needs (it is a lot better), but has learnt to be more hygienic and discreet (well he is in his mid teens).
How to stop it? Obviously I did not find a quick fix, but he has got there in the end. We did try the all in one trick (over night time) to keep everything in one place. Basically we got to know his bodies routine which usually was just before bath and bed, so I sat him on the loo, and read stories whilst the bath ran, (bathroom needs to be relaxing warm - turn the radiator up after tea) in the hope of getting everything where it needed to be, and cleaned up. Not very private I suppose - we worked on that later.
I sympathise.

Thank you maggiso. DS can't wipe his bottom so I'm sure this contributes to the reasons why his fingers find their way there.

I really appreciate you posting, knowing that there is a light at the end of the tunnel is really reassuring.

On the bottom wiping front - I will admit it took Ds years to get good at it - but found a mirror helped! Once he could see there was a need to wipe he had a stab at wiping. It took a long time to develop the dexterity (and contortionism) to wipe well. He still uses a mirror but we have one discreetly propped behind the bathroom door as if it has been forgotten there!

My ds can't wipe his bum. I have gone back to toilet training with toddler wipes. Not easy with absent minded dyspraxic child. Like these

Have you tried those bed sheet thingies with wings for night time?

You just whip off the topper and diluted sheet. Ds seems to able to wet the bed and his body heat drys it out
www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B000MEV9UE/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?qid=1424882274&sr=8-3&pi=AC_SY200_QL40&keywords=mattress+protector+wings&dpPl=1&dpID=41Hf7eg9ZQL&ref=plSrch

My DS can't wipe his bottom either (partly because I'm too worried about the mess he might make so I've never tried to teach him). He is 13 .
I'm glad I'm not alone in this. Ds3 also has really poor awareness of when he needs the toilet.

Those sheets look fab, I'll invest in some.

I have a feeling I'll have to help with bottom wiping forever, but I will try him with a mirror.