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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Original poster

Going to Tribunal for DLA this week. Any advice please?!

25 replies

scoobyww · 21/10/2006 15:36

Hi, I am new to this but would really appreciate any advice. I applied for DLA for my 11 year old almost a year ago and am finally facing a tribunal this week. DS has a diagnosis of Aspergers, OCD and severe behavioural problems. He is also depressed and at times, suicidal. Because he does not show the behaviour problems at school, they would not support my claim but we are all close to breaking point at home. He is physically aggressive; smashes/breaks things; threatens to stab himself or us; has no danger awareness; no social skills (= no friends); will not allow us to go out as a family and refuses point blank to go to shops or other busy areas - the list is endless and I could bore you all, but I won't. I only discovered (too late)that there is a support agency here that could have helped me with this appeal and instead am going alone to the meeting. Anyone else gone through this, or could anyone advise me please? Thankyou so much.

OP posts:

coppertop · 21/10/2006 16:07

I don't have personal experience of the appeal process etc but know that those who do often take in a diary of the child's behaviour or care needed over a few days/weeks.

I don't know if you've seen the guide that's often linked to on here about filling in the DLA forms (which you've obviously done already) but if not there might be some points in there to add.

I'll go and have a quick look for you.

Welcome to mumsnet and the SN board.

coppertop · 21/10/2006 16:10

DLA guide

Original poster

scoobyww · 21/10/2006 16:13

Thankyou coppertop. I have actually used those forms to fill in last batch and have also sent diary sheets and even 'tape recorded' meltdowns! Despite his Psychiatrist saying that he feels Ds meets all criteria 100%+, I was still turned down! It is all so frustrating as if we do not get some help soon, DS will become just another statistic or worse!

OP posts:

coppertop · 21/10/2006 16:17

It makes me so that they make people jump through the hoops like this.

Jambuttie's appeal was yesterday so hopefully she'll more specific advice.

Original poster

scoobyww · 21/10/2006 16:25

Thankyou coppertop for your warm welcome and support.I sometimes feel such a failure because I can't help my own child.

OP posts:

coppertop · 21/10/2006 16:33

You're more than welcome, Scooby.

I'll bet my boys' DLA that you're not a failure. It's just that horrible "I bet someone else could do a much better job than me" feeling that I think we all get. It's a load of rubbish of course but we still think it.

reiver · 21/10/2006 20:49

Welcome scoobyww. Good luck with the appeal this week. Has the psych provided you with a report or some sort of back up for the tribunal?

Original poster

scoobyww · 22/10/2006 18:34

Hi Reiver, long story - DLA sent form to wrong address and a GP who has never seen DS filled it in by mistake! I had to tipex his answers out and ask psych to complete again, so yes, I do have report. Ironic thing is that psych was the person who told me to apply for DLA in first place!

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Original poster

scoobyww · 23/10/2006 13:37

Thanks to all who have answered so far, but if anyone out there has been through this already, I would really appreciate an inkling of what exactly to expect. I am terrified!!
Thanks!

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Original poster

scoobyww · 23/10/2006 14:16

Is Jambuttie on here by any chance? Would love to ask her how it went..and hope it was good news!

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coppertop · 23/10/2006 14:27

Here is Jambuttie's thread.

Please note the bit about drinks and cake.

Original poster

scoobyww · 23/10/2006 14:29

Thank you again Coppertop! You have made me feel really welcome on here!

OP posts:

coppertop · 23/10/2006 14:31

That's because you are welcome on here.

saggarmakersbottomknocker · 23/10/2006 14:57

scooby - I've been to appeal - you can see a bit about it on the thread that was linked. It was fine, honestly, I went alone and was very nervous but the panel were lovely, the doctor in particular was very understanding. The diary stuff is really useful to them and they may ask you quite a bit about that.

Good luck......looking forward to more virtual cake

Original poster

scoobyww · 24/10/2006 12:34

Thank you saggar. I just wish it was Saturday now and all over! Have not slept for last 2 weeks. A lesser mortal would have given up long ago, but I am the only person who can fight for my child..and the rest of my family! I only hope they see sense..or take pity on me..and really try to understand what we go through each and every day.

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jambuttie · 24/10/2006 12:43

Just seen this thread!!!!(sending huge choccy cake and mega loads of alcohol through cyber space you all p**d yet??)

Scooby I must admit I was nervouse going into the appeal but once we started talking about my son it kinda flew by.

The appeal hearing lasts about half an hour and the decision is given shortly after.

There will be a minimum of 3 panel member 1 being a doctor, 1 banker/financial advisor person and one prize super bitch!!!!

I took along a diary too only about 10 days worth of how my sons daily living is- remember and include any night care that is needed too.

Have you got anyone to represent you? I took along a staff member from the advice shop who was great and a friend came in with me for support.

Be strong is my advice and remeber you are doing this for your son who needs this extra care- fight for what is right fully your hun

keep us posted

Original poster

scoobyww · 24/10/2006 12:49

Thank you Jambuttie. I read your thread and hoped you would reply to me, even if it was just so I could say "well done"! Sadly, I discovered my local advice shop too late (2 weeks ago!) but they have said that if this appeal fails, I can go to the final step of commissioner and they will help me then.I am going alone and it all seems so daunting! Thanks for the cake..sadly I don't drink - but it is sometimes a very tempting solution!! Will let you know how it goes..if my heart stays beating til then!

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jambuttie · 24/10/2006 14:19

good luck hun.

You know that if you want you can postpone the date so as the advice shop can represent you????

I would probably go with your appeal date, take all the evidence you have with you and remember you will be asked loads of questions

Original poster

scoobyww · 26/10/2006 15:01

Thanks to all of you who have offered advice and support.

It is the Big Day tomorrow and I cannot begin to tell you hw scared I am now (But my toilet can!! LOL!!)

Will let you all know asap!

Thanks again! :0

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coppertop · 27/10/2006 09:55

Good luck with the tribunal, Scooby. Let us know how it went.

Original poster

scoobyww · 27/10/2006 12:29

Cannot believe it. just back from tribunal and was turned down again. Mind just seemed to go blank in there and thought of loads i should have said after! One more chance to appeal and will go to Welfare Rights for help this time. So upset

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coppertop · 27/10/2006 13:05

Oh no.

Hopefully the Welfare Rights people will be able to give you the boost you need.

Do you have any idea when the next hearing will be?

Original poster

scoobyww · 27/10/2006 13:38

Thanks Coppertop. have no idea how long the next stage will take. Am so disillusioned with the whole process now. Feel even more that I have failed DS and also tempted to give up.

OP posts:

coppertop · 27/10/2006 15:05

You haven't failed him at all. It's just the way the cr@ppy system seems to work (or not!).

I think that if you gave up now you'd later be wondering "What if?" and probably feeling worse. At the very least just talk to the Welfare Rights people and see what they say. It sounds as though you just need someone to be there with you to back you up.

I've just been attempting to go through ds1's DLA renewal forms and it's as hellish as I'd remembered it to be.

Whatever you decide to do we'll be here. xx

jambuttie · 29/10/2006 14:11

just found this thread again

for you hun, can't beleive they bloody refused it

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