Sorry this is a little long...It's just one of those days, when you realise that trying to get DS (age 5, ASD) to fit in with NT children is getting more and more distressing. DH took him to a party today (6th birthday) and came back early, very upset, saying he is not taking him to any more parties. Of course all the other kids were playing and having fun with each other, and DS just wanted to spend the whole time opening and closing the door and paying no attention to anything else. The difference just gets more pronounced as we go on.
It all just feels so sad, and DH was so upset he also cancelled a playdate we had booked this afternoon. He said that he just could not stand going to someone's house and sitting there watching DS constantly opening and closing their doors and oven and fridge and cupboards, and ignoring everything else. We try so hard to feel like and just be ordinary people as far as we possibly can, but the disability is starting to open up such a gap between DS and his peers. He looks looked at more in the street now too, because it is obvious that he is big enough to be expected to be talking. And he doesn't, he just makes funny noises. I am not embarrassed exactly, and anyone who doesn't like it can get stuffed, but it does make you feel different.
It also makes me realise, with impending dread, that the plan we have now (mainstream school with one to one part time, and home ABA programme part time) is only going to go so far and he is probably not going to be able to get anything much from mainstream school at some point in the future. At which point the huge fight will begin to get him into an ABA school (Treehouse, which happens to be two minutes' walk from our house). The LEA are going to oppose at every turn and try to send him to their own special school, which does not use ABA and which would set him back hugely. I have no doubt it will all mean going back to a Tribunal at some point and all the stress and expense of that.
No answers expected, just feeling sad....