School still not recognizing it And it's infront of their faces ! ASD

[happyanyounoitflapyourhands]

well my sons has all his ASD assessment now and awaiting feed back meeting this is after a 2.5 year wait! So school tell me they don't see anything - this is fine I'm glad he's getting on well.

It makes me feel uneasy when I see his behaviors ect at school and they don't recognize it .

I've been going to family learning (we're your child comes in and play games ect)

The whole time DS is very controlling doesn't want to join in eye contact is minimal and he ignores questions when asked ect Classic ASD signs - why can't they see it ? It makes me sad because I see him presenting as he does at home there it's like they are ignorant to it .

I may add its foundation phase he is 5 and isn't disruptive and wondering if becuase he is going round smiling they think he's fine ?

He also does a silly blinking thing when asked questions he almost does it when unsure of something ??

Anyone else had similar experience ???

They also say they don't see his sensory behavioirs - yesterday he was shouting to loud hiding u see the table and making silly noises !! Just upsets me :(

Hi happy love the name

I think part of the problem is that we are so tuned in to our kids that we notice every clue to how they are feeling, we actually have to do it to keep them on an even keel.

Teachers simply dont have, the time, the knowledge or sometimes the inclination to see what we see. They see a seething mass of 25+ 5 year olds all with their own set of quirks and differences and they attempt to guide them through the day!!

They do not mean to not see it, they just cant.

Keep chipping away at them and gradually they may begin to scratch the surface of what it means to be a child with Asd and sensory processing issues in a mainstream primary.

If your Ds ever needs a break from it, dont be afraid to keep him off. It is exhausting for our kids to get through each day at school and can impact on their mental health as they get older.

Good luck

Schools often listen better to other professionals, as the condescending view as you are 'just a mum' often prevails.

Incredibly frustrating but that's how it often goes.

You need a good professional on your side... Get them to a meeting at school and get them to explain to school what the diagnosis means and what your child needs.

I know it's frustrating and I just want to scream at them when they nod and take on board everything that's being said, because it comes from OT EP SALT etc, when they've ignored me saying the same previously. Try and accept now that as a mother of a child with ASD you will have many battles ahead of you and frustration and dealing with unfairness / incompetence will become part of your daily existence. It never gets easier, but acceptance helps you get through it...

If it takes a professional to set the ball rolling in them understanding, so be it. Bite your tongue, resist the need to point out that everything that they've just heard you've already told them . Hope, that once they have had the info 'from the horses mouth' they will then put into place what your child needs.

Very often, once enlightened by another professional, they will then start to listen a bit more to you (but not always...)

Never be afraid to advocate for your child's needs, but also never be too proud to accept any help you can get. If another professional helps them to 'see,' it makes your life and your child's life easier in the long run.

Play the long game not the short game... you will get there and maybe even stay sane in the process.

Stock up on survival tools... wine and chocolate feature highly in my tool chest.

Believe me the more you go to School with an issue the more they will oppose your opinions. with us it got to levels where they full disputed all of my reports about my son. This was after diagnosis too!!!!

Some teachers (not all) prefer to think of parents as inferior and that we cannot possibly know more than them. Some seem to take it personally and that we are trying to tell them their job. Thing is they are not (mostly) trained in developmental or mental heath issues but some seem to think because they are working with so many children they know all the issues.

I totally recognise that there are teachers who are open-minded (we had one last year), but the year before was nothing short of shocking and appalling for DS1.

Sorry for ranting, but it hit my nerve. I hate people having to go through this and your DC sounds like mine. Doesn't make a fuss, not disruptive.

You need to get the ball rolling with Health (paediatrician) if you haven't already. Sounds like an Occupational Therapy referral wouldn't be a bad thing.

Your DC is holding it together at the moment but at some point they will have had enough. and it will come out. It did for my DC and we have just got his statement (he's year 4!).

I have to say the above advice regarding professionals is very true. They may refer you to CAMHS to for assessment. Get anyone medical. They see these things. OK, well we had to do a second opinion too, but once you find the right person. My DS has diagnosis (x5) now. Incredible from nothing at first!

So many hugs. Keep with it. Be sure of yourself. YOU KNOW YOUR CHILD!!!