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Home ABC chart - Need some help please...

17 replies

minionmadness · 10/10/2014 10:17

School are doing one and I decided to do one too so we can compare. DS is having lots of behavioural issues since starting YR2 and we are trying to establish what's going wrong for him. Things like the teachers voice being different, her hair changing styles are the sort of things that are bothering him.

I'm ok ( I think) with the ABC parts but I want to go one step further and establish the trigger. So for example...

A = spelling homework
B = Lashed out at me when he decided he got one wrong calling
C = Lost ipad time

I believe the trigger was anxiety due to the fact that he hates getting things wrong because he suffers from low self esteem.

Am I way off the mark... any thoughts.

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Jasonandyawegunorts · 10/10/2014 12:40

Maybe try going further back in the day, what happened before that?

Borka · 10/10/2014 13:28

I might be wrong but I don't think the lost ipad time is really the consequence. I mean, I know it's the consequence you decided on, but you could have chosen a different one.

What is the consequence for your DS in terms of what he actually caused to happen? Was he able to stop doing the spelling homework? Did he get attention from you? I think that sort of thing is more useful in terms of working out triggers & what he's finding difficult.

Borka · 10/10/2014 13:31

So at school, does he do things which mean he will be able to leave the classroom? And is that because of sensory issues, eg with the teacher's voice?

minionmadness · 10/10/2014 13:55

Ah I see... so I'm getting the "C" wrong then.

Or am I not understanding any of them?

A = What specific activity or event occurred before the behaviour...so what was happening or what was said
B = Behaviour - what did the person do or say... ds hit me
C = Consequence, I was thinking it was the consequence to him.

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bialystockandbloom · 10/10/2014 14:04

I don't think you're way off the mark at all - it sounds like you identified in this incident what it was that triggered the behaviour. ABC are useful over time to see if there's a pattern, so if you start to see the same thing building up over days/weeks (eg frustration about doing homework or getting something wrong) you can then start on finding ways to help with that particular difficulty.

Also agree with Borka, that you also need to look at how you deal with the A and the B too, before deciding on the C. I think there are two strands to ABC charts: the first is to start by identifying patterns, but to be really effective, they then need to be decoded to help you with how you react to the behaviour too.

eg if by lashing out at you it means he's escaped from doing his homework, even if he gets a punishment by losing the ipad, you (and he) still hasn't started to get to grips with the actual difficulty he's having. I'm not suggesting that in your place I wouldn't give him a consequence for hitting, but it needs to be consistent, and he needs the same boundaries and rules all the time, and across every aspect of his day. So if your consistent rule is hitting = lost ipad, that's fine, but if it was only applied in this instance, he might have just learnt that finding homework difficult = no ipad. The thing that he really needs help with in this case is managing his frustration.

I'd also hope that school will do something meaningful about the way they do theirs too. Taking data is only worthwhile if you then find a way of doing something about it.

bialystockandbloom · 10/10/2014 14:09

Sorry x-posts. No, I think you're right about what the ABC stand for. But in many cases, the consequence can be just the natural consequence of his behaviour. Eg my ds can talk rather randomly to his friends about something which is of no interest to them. One of them might just walk off. So that's the natural consequence.

It also needs to be really carefully thought through esp with school about how they handle things (as Borka said). If he has a behaviour at school does that mean he can leave the classroom, for example?

Trying to explain this, sorry, not very well! What I suppose I mean is that the C is as important a part of the chart as the A and the B, as it's only the consequence (whether natural or how an adult chooses to handle it) of his behaviour that will help teach him in the future.

minionmadness · 10/10/2014 14:33

Thank you... that makes sense (sort of) It's open to interpretation though isn't it.

In my example I believe the behaviour is a result of self imposed unreasonable expectations and his low self esteem, for example if he feels he can't do something (spell a word) then this will increase his anxiety and this manifests in frustration which results in physical/verbal aggression.

So I suppose we need to find a way to reduce his anxiety and expectations.

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Jasonandyawegunorts · 10/10/2014 14:41

we need to find a way to reduce his anxiety and expectations.

It's probably not HIS expectations so much as how he perceives others expectations of him. Rather than his own expectations being high, they are very low, but he believes other have expectation which he cannot meet.

It's almost a confidence thing If you see what i mean?

bialystockandbloom · 10/10/2014 14:47

I have to say I might look at other things as well as anxiety. My ds can also get frustrated to the point of anger if he finds things hard, or can't do something. But it isn't anxiety, in his case it's more like an exaggerated form of the "oh ffs!" I might do if I can't do something instantly. Eg I was putting together a flatpack cabinet last night, struggled over getting a screw in, and got really pissed off, started shouting and swearing then stomped off to get a glass of wine Blush Not actually that different...

Might be worth looking into ways of recognising and regulating emotions, and other ways of letting off steam that don't involve lashing out - eg counting to ten, deep breaths etc.

minionmadness · 10/10/2014 17:58

That could be a possibility, although he does really seem anxious. For example...

I don't force homework, I ask him if he want's to give it a go, if no then fine, if yes we start. At some point he decides whether he can do it and starts to get that look on his face, I reassure him throughout that I will help him and he doesn't have to do it. Conversation as follows...

ds - I can't do it
me - that's fine I will help you
ds - I'm scared I can't do it
me - again that's fine we can leave it, you don't have to do it
ds - I want to do it or Mrs Teacher will send me to Mr Head teacher
me - no she won't...

By this point he is near hysterical, he doesn't want to do it and he doesn't NOT want to do it... turmoil.

I only ever issues a sanction for hitting, throwing or disparaging others, and it is always a loss of ipad time.

The issues are really in school, they are experiencing behaviour such as not sitting with his class at carpet time, refusal to follow instructions and engage in activity, disappearing from class, stimming and disrupting the learning of others, spending lots of time in the toilet washing hands, disparaging others and has pushed on of his peers in an attempt to get out of class.

Honestly it's like he's regressed back to Foundation stage and he has just gone into YR2. So clearly something is not right in school for him.

Hence the ABC chart.

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bialystockandbloom · 10/10/2014 18:58

Wrt the homework, you could try a form of errorless learning - where you start with a tiny exercise which you know he can do perfectly. Reward him massively for completing it. If he doesn't try, or doesn't complete, no reward, but equally no sanction - just no comment at all about it, be completely neutral. Start with something more 'fun' than work, so even something like colouring in, or stickers.

Each time he tries something give him a huge reward, so he associates the trying with the reward. When this has been mastered (might take days/weeks), you can very gradually move towards work which is more challenging for him. But only on a graduated scale, so eg 4 days out of 5 you give him a very short, easy thing, then one of the days it's something a bit harder.

Every time he does it without blowing up, give him a big reward. If he does get angry, just be neutral, no response at all, just stop the work and do something else instead, with no comment other than "ok let's do xyz now".

This might work at least to reduce his anxiety about actually starting the work, as it does sound like a confidence issue about starting the work, rather than the work itself being too hard, so this approach could help with making it more fun and less stressful, as he hopefully won't realise that the point of the exercise is getting him to sit down and start it, rather than how hard the work itself is.

Wrt the rest of the behaviour at school - what support does he get? Does he have a statement? How do they deal with all this?

minionmadness · 10/10/2014 19:14

Thanks... Great advice, I'll definitely give that a go, I'm willing to try anything, he appears to be regressing in every aspect since going into YR2. I am extremely concerned for him, he seems almost manic at times.

Wrt school... No he doesn't have a statement. He does get additional funding a medium level. In response to the above school have temporarily increased his support.

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minionmadness · 10/10/2014 19:17

Sorry pressed to soon...

We had everyone together this week (CT, SENCO, Inclusion support, area SENCO) and collated a behaviour management plan along with implementing the ABC chart.

Nothings changed at home... could he be regressing??

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bialystockandbloom · 10/10/2014 22:39

My ds went through a tough time in Y2. I don't really know why, but I think in his case in part it was that his peers were changing, developing socially, at a quicker rate, and he found it hard to integrate. Eg play was becoming more sophisticated and imaginative, and also the 'banter' was becoming more subtle and harder for him to interpret. I think the age of around 7 is quite strange, and transitional - they're coming out of little-childhood but can be really unprepared for the next stage - especially if there are developmental diffulties! Also in ds's case, his teacher in Y2 was rubbish compared with previous one. But obviously I don't know if that applies to your ds.

He's just gone into Y3 and its going much much better. There is hope Smile It is hard though - you feel that you've just about got on top of something then another new curveball comes along which you're not prepared for and have no idea how to deal with. Constantly new challenges!

Does he get any help socially, in the playground? How does he get on there?

PolterGoose · 11/10/2014 17:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jasonandyawegunorts · 11/10/2014 18:21

For me the problem with an ABC chart type thing is that it doesn't look at a long enough period of time. There are often a long series of antecedents before the 'behaviour', the trigger is often just the tipping point, the real work has to be done hours, sometimes days before. Diaries might be more useful to get a fuller picture.

I would fully agree with this, in my opinion (for what it's worth) looking at events before the incident will help.

minionmadness · 11/10/2014 19:07

Thanks all.

Polter* I don't disagree with that. I've looked at the "Lives in the Balance" website and I get it, I really do.

In reality I try to use the 3 basket rule to a degree, I am only prepared to tolerate a meltdown over the three things (basket A) I mentioned. The issues like following instructions such as getting ready for school, things we have to do...(basket B) I manage by offering choices to ds such as... You can get dressed now and have time for some TV or you can take your time and miss TV time. He will invariably choose the first, albeit begrudgingly. Lastly things like not sitting at the table to eat (basket C) I don't worry about.

Since he went into YR2 he appears to have regressed to behaviour issues all the time and the ABC request from me was an attempt to try to get them to establish the triggers instead of just going straight to the sanction. I told school that if this carries on I would rather pull him out and home ed, they agreed and we meet to collate the behaviour management plan.

Sadly in school they can't be as relaxed as we can at home... CT is genuinely trying very hard, she had a list of strategies ready for her list of behaviours (of which there were a lot more than had been reported in the home/school diary).

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