Is it worth making yet another complaint or should I give up?

[PeachyClairHasBadHair]

Given that Sam's potential school move has fallen througgh (we simply cannot get him there- no car available and too far to walk), I kinda accepted Sam won't be getting help from the LEA at any time soon. So imagine my surprise when we were told he was getting an hours Ed Psych a week handling self esteem, anger management, friend ships etc.

ever since the firsts ession however Sam has been averaging a meltdown of supreme proportion every night. Investigation ahs revealed....

1. Everyone else in this group (5 others) is female, Sam feels he will be ridiculed by the other boys when they find out;

2. despite theoretically bulding self esteem, she managed to call him Simon all the way through (SENCO confirmed this, thought it was funny-???)

3. He finds an entire hour simpy too much, makes him really emotional

4. We don't know who the person doing this is, we were told it would be the Ed Psych but it's not the one we know

5. After 10 weeks it will cease, they are going to train a 'parent'. I am sorry, but WTF??? Sam has Autism, he needs trained help, not a parent going 'oooh we can share nicely can't we girls... oh yes and you Simon'

6. Apart from one other child, none of the others are SN, just as Sam explains' a bunch of bullies and nasty kids'- Sam thinks he si being punisjhed

Don't give up. It can't be 'made right' if you don't say what is going wrong. I know you must probably be sick of fighting for everything, but eventually I'm sure things will begin to get easier.

The school have made it known that they consider that Sam's only problem is having me as a Mother. Since they said that (didn't realise I was in the room listening to the phone convo) I ahven't been able to talk to them, I have panic attacks before even going in most days . Plus I am concerned that if I complain when they at least try, they'll thin I am going to try and sabotage things and give up, when all I want is quality appropriate services- i feel this could worsen Sam's self esteem.

There have been issues with another boy and they have been aksed to keep apart but they haven't told the other parent so boy is allowd to follow hima round. I did try and explain that if anyone manages to get close to ZSam this si what happens- they didn't listen.

Only thing that's amde him smile since school went back is that he is gettinga kitten- practical empathy lessons

I know you have probably thought of all this but do you have someone who can act as an advocate for you, go with you to meetings, into school etc just to boost you up a bit? Almost to have as a witness that you're not being unreasonable? Or even get in touch with a children's advocacy service to speak on behalf of Sam who is emotionally not so connected?

I'm very sorry I can't help more, I feel very angry that you are made to feel like this. I have experience of SN but not as a parent. I am on your behalf, which is no help to you at all! Hope someone comes along who has some better ideas.

I meant to say emotionally not so connected to him

Thanks Annie. The local SN people have offered to advocate, although they were the ones who said get him to another school with this bunch - I had forgotten them though.

Peachy,

Will the LEA not provide transport for this other school?.

Have you talked with IPSEA about this - there is a section on there regarding transport. They may be able to advise. Presumably as well this other school would be far better for Sam.

As for the points one thru six I am disgusted on your behalf and I would look into withdrawing him from those sessions asap. Did his current school set this up?. They can't even get Sam's name right!!. How dare they

Spoke to IPSEA before they ewre great, haven't been able to get through since- however they firmly believed (as did kidscape) that this was a firm issue with Welsh religious schools,a nd that we should moe school. which we cannot. Really about transport- school had agreed to haev him and everyhting.

Sam saw a SALT today They told him he passed everything, but who knows? Doubt I ever will, frankly!

Schoolc alled at 8.30 am today, Dh got to bed at 5.45 am (nights) and it was the SENCO saying ahd Sam told us it was non uniform today? er, no. hd nothing dry (can't use tumble dryer atm coz it needs dorr open andcat stuck in ill). Anyway, he went half and half in uniform an d civvys. Expecting a major melt down as not time to prepare him.