Anyone's dc on meds for ADHD? How much of a 'normal' life does it give you?

[twoandahalftimesthree]

Ds has been on meds for his adhd for a year now and they really, really help him enormously. However, life is still very challenging. A family mealtime is an indigestion-inducing whirlwind and the idea of ever going on a holiday abroad is an absolute non-starter. A trip in our own car to our own quiet caravan by the sea is challenge enough and dh and me are exhausted by the time we come back from a 'holiday'. dd's friends have told her of the exciting foreign holidays they've had this summer and she's asked me why we can't go abroad, I would bloody love to!
So, I have got to wondering if this is as good as it gets. Our lives are pretty much transformed from the hellish existence we had previously and I am grateful for that. But, we (as a family) are still excluded from doing an awful lot of 'normal' things. Just going for a walk in the country park was a disaster last weekend, I wasn't sure how I was going to get him home safely. We still can't go out shopping, we still can't invite people over to our home as we never quite know when he will kick off (we have some very understanding friends but it just takes all the fun out of the occasion for everyone).
We have a review appt with the psych tomorrow so I was wondering what other people's experiences were.

It's much the same for us with ds. He's been on medication for four years now and it definitely helps to moderate the symptoms but they're still there, he still has ADHD and medication certainly isn't a cure in his case. We still have to live our lives largely around him, and I think that's just part of the deal. We're in a fortunate position of ds being an only child so his issues don't impact on siblings. That must be tough for your daughter, but I don't know what else you can do when it comes to family holidays etc. Would it be feasible for to go on holiday with friends' families, just so she can get the experience?

It's definitely worth mentioning to the psych at your review. You may need to tweak the dosage a bit. We have altered ds's several times over the years, but I think this is as good as it's going to get.

Psych today suggested we tried either a different stimulant medication (elvanse) or a non stimulant (straterra).
Anyone got any experience of those?

Ds takes Strattera (atomoxetine) at 40mg daily, but still needs methylpheniate up to three times a day to function at his best. It's worth giving it a try. Often the aim is to rely on atomoxetine which is taken one dose a day and builds up over six weeks. The benefit of methylphenidate is that you can stop it straight away if needs be, or fiddle with dosage as you see fit (we're currently missing ds's teatime dose when he doesn't have evening activities, and he's coping well), but you need to withdraw slowly from atomoxetine if it doesn't suit.

Has psych given you any information leaflets to read up on the options? They should do, otherwise you'd be making a decision without relevant knowledge.

OP I am going to stick my neck out and say no it does'nt always have to be like this, and yes it can get better. It sounds to me like the meds could do with tweaking, sometimes I think we stagger on thinking 'this is our lot, now we just have to get on with it' when maybe there might be better meds out there that help your son more and yes, give all of you more of a life.
for whats it's worth my DS10 has ADHD and his meds have been adjusted over the years. We manage to have holidays trips out and go to restaurants without killing ourselves or him(!), we have a younger DS6 also. Obviously we have our moments when it goes pear shaped, but his medication has been key to everything.

I don't know how old your ds is, but be prepared for a blip at puberty. I have the same conversation at every meds review with ds's psych: "We can't work out if is due to his Adhd, hormones, or meds reaction". It could be one of them or all three - you just have to work with what you've got and tweak accordingly.