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8 year old DS ASD/ADHD starting to get very angry and violent at home. Advice needed!

5 replies

MyAngelChuckles · 30/06/2014 17:17

Hey, my 8 year old had trouble at his previous school for violent and impulsive behaviour, they just did not know how to handle him but after a long fight with the lea I got him statemented and put in a resource class at a new school where he has been thriving and his violent outbursts have all but disappeared, although he is very arguementative they are working on that and I can't fault them. He is making huge progress academically as well.

But here's the hitch, although he can and will argue until he is blue in the face he hasn't been violent at home since he was a toddler and still couldn't talk. I am a single Mum and he is my only child, we have always had a good relationship and even when we don't see eye to eye we normally manage to resolve things peacefully even when he can't get what he wants but recently he has been getting angry to the point that he is in tears, banging doors, throwing things, even taken a couple of swings at me.

He eventually just completely loses it and it's like watching a different child. There is just no reasoning behind his eyes and it's scaring me a little, he completely loses control and where as I used to be able to bring him down without giving into him before it's just not working any more and I refuse to just let him have what he wants just for an easy life.

Does anybody have any strategy's or advice for an older child? I am using the same strats as I did when he was 5,6 but he is that bit older and more aware now but google as I might it's still all sticker charts, time outs etc which have stopped working :(

OP posts:
PolterGoose · 30/06/2014 17:34

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PolterGoose · 30/06/2014 17:35

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zzzzz · 30/06/2014 18:51

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MyAngelChuckles · 04/07/2014 13:26

Hey, sorry it's taken so long to say thanks...life got a little hectic :(

Poltergoose. I will have a look at the links and the books look good, will definitely pick up the explosive child one. I already use a scale with him in the form of a thermometer type chart :)

zzzzz, I used to be able to talk him down, now he just gets more irate no matter how calm I keep my voice. His triggers are not (in fact hardly ever) clear and it takes ages to get to the bottom of it. It could be something like some one ignoring him that morning and he's sat and stewed on it all day. He used to be a child that lived on the very outside of his skin. Trigger = instant reaction. Now he seems to be learning to contain himself a little but then it explodes hours later. Thankyou for the advice though. Every little snippet helps atm x

OP posts:
Levantine · 05/07/2014 12:19

It's a long process isn't it. I tend to just potter round tidying or whatever. I sometimes write little notes to him as talking makes things worse. The five point scale is meant to be really good. It might be particularly bad because of end of term outings/disruption. My ds has been quite agressive and teary this morning so we are having a super quiet day

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