Is it worth pushing for Educational Psyc appointment ?

[Babieseverywhere]

I have a meeting at school tomorrow requested by school to discuss DS (no dx suspected asd by me) and introducing iep.

The parent partnership lady volunteered to come with me to support me, not that I have met her yet.

I asked about Ed Psy last meeting and was told that the ASD outreach did the same stuff.

Now ASD outreach came out did a 20 minute km classroom observation with teacher and small group and no difficulties were spotted (except an iep to transition to next year is to be written)

Today I spoke to a lady in Ed Psy and explained my situation.

Ed Psy said if the school asked, she recommend an observation spanning classroom AND playground, plus taking history from me and the teacher.

She said my son had plenty of interesting behaviours (like the ringing when distressed) and if he had something like aspergers that would explain why school sees nothing, yet DS has to be dragged into school screaming.

BE drops dead from shock of speaking to someone who did not turn around and blame me !

I asked if I could do anything further to help DS and she said no You sound like a very understanding and interested mother, using visual timetables and emotion charts at home. Sounds like the trigger is at school.

She thinks the SALT appointment will be well placed to see DS difficulties and I have tracked down the Comm Paed appointment. ..early September !

Question is, I can't do much on the NHS side until the appointments happen, is it worth working on school to get this wonderful Ed Pysch in to see DS or not bother as it is just six weeks of he'll ish school runs till summer holidays ?

Leaning towards trying, as it would be good for the Senco to hear that intelligent children can mask during school day and still be asd...This may or may not apply to my DS but it is still worth knowing.

Are you firing in all directions again? You're going to exhaust yourself!!

Ask the EP dept what pathway usually leads to their involvement. The school will have to pay for her either through money or credit off a pre-purchased service. Unless your child is a problem to THEM they may well resist.

Phone the NHS people and tell them you want an earlier appointment/will take a cancellation etc. focus your energy there.

Perhaps submit an application for a SA as the EP may be able to get in that way.

(Blush) Maybe I am.

I have his hearing appointment next week and salt the week after, both meting need to produce reports for the Comm Paed appointment. But the one I have got an appointment with has a very good rep. I would rather wait to see HER than an earlier appointment with someone else iyswim.

So I am shooting off in another direction but just because I will gave the Senco and back up support from Parent partnership lady in the same room tomorrow and this Ed Psy actually seems to believe me!

Roll on the summer holidays and no school runs for the summer :)

Star What does "application for a SA" mean...

School Action ?

Statutory assessment for a statement.

I'll see if they will agree to request the Ed Psy tomorrow and if not consider the statement route...not that I know anything about that stuff.

You don't have to because WE do, and then you will and then you'll be telling the next person....

Star, you are wonderful :)

Star, you are wonderful :)

After the school meeting Thursday when the Senco said they could/would not do no more than they currently are for my DS, and refysed to involve Ed Psy.

I felt at the end of the road with the school, thought I would pod along and look at other paths.

Then I get an email from Senco saying Behavioural support and Parent Partnership want a multi disiplinary/agency meeting ? Senco even mentioned involving Ed Psy later on ?

Is this something worth going to or agreeing to. The mention of Ed Psy interests me but is this an opportunity for all the agencies to get together to blame me ? Either do I agree and attend or look at a different school ?

Sounds to me like it is the SENCo that wants the multidisciplinary meeting.

Tell her you will agree on the proviso that the EP attends after having seen your child.

Otherwise I can't see the point other than for you to be set up.

Either way, never ever agree to a meeting where you have not seen the proposed agenda first, and, if you want, the expected outcomes for your child as a result of holding that meeting. Because if it is not going to benefit your child then there is absolutely no point to it other than to stroke the SENCo's ego.

What is the point of them ?

I am reluctant in light that the school can't/won't help further, I doubt there is any point.

Senco claims it is behavioural support's idea (my next call) Senco thinks behavioural support can sort everything out in a home visit though three long phone calls have had no suggestions yet
But she did mention maybe bringing in the Ed Psy.

Don't be drawn in on maybes.

Honestly. You need to learn this lesson FAST....... Focus on OUTCOMES otherwise you'll exhaust yourself. Don't be caught up in 'occupying' meetings going round in circles of frustration.

Think of your time as money in business terms. £50 per hour plus travel. Your product/investment - your child.

Would you spend £100 from your business fund attending a 2 hour meeting like this? I wouldn't. What a waste of money you could use to invest in your child in other ways.

Would you spend £100 from your business fund attending a meeting like this after an EP has both seen your son and agreed to attend too?

Yes. It might not be a good investment but it could be worth the risk.

My gut instinct is to say, unless the school choose to invite Ed Psy in to assess, there is no point in meeting up at this point.

I have decided this is my child and therefore getting him the help he needs is my project and I am going to manage it myself...and I am excellent project manager with a good track record !

I feel that there is no point in including school in anything for the forseeable future, as they have already told me there is nothing more they can do.

I will attend the NHS appointments and I will manage the behavioural team with support from parent partnership, keeping the school OUT of the loop. They can will not help us. Then they can clear the path for me to help my DS, without them.

Of course if they will play ball and DO something positive then that is different. But I don't intend in attending any further unecessary meetings.

Plus I am no longer worried about Comm Paed appointment as if he gets a label or not, the school will do no more.

I thought a label came with automatic right to help at school but it doesn't so I don't care about the label anymore iyswim.

'Plus I am no longer worried about Comm Paed appointment as if he gets a label or not, the school will do no more.'

Actually, the school can and will do a lot more if they are made to. Also, getting a statement gives you a right to change school to a better one. It also, if you fought for it, can give you direct payments that will cover some aspects of the provision your child needs so you don't have to go through the SENCo. If you asked for ABA and got it (whole other fight) then you'd even get to pick the 1:1.

It would absolutely be worth writing to the SENCO to clarify that she has said that the school can and will do no more as this will either a)get a written response telling you that you have misunderstood and they'll be offering loads more, or b) be useful evidence for a statement to demonstrate that the school have exhausted all they are able to do within their current resources.

When you say 'in writing' an email would do ?

To write I will be quoting that comment and a couple others to ensure we are talking from the same page.

I just feel with his mild traits, we would be laughed put if the room, if we asked for a statement or actual therapy...not just by the school but by the people who decide these things.

I am lucky there are no/little signs at school. Long term this gives him a better chance of a full life. But I really need him to he happy and educated too :( :)

Yes an email will do.

Babies You are not a new parent dilly-dallying around for the attention. You say his traits are mild but everyone says that about their children in the early years. That doesn't mean they aren't but I just wish you'd stop doubting yourself and stop contacting everyone it occurs you to phone.

I know that you're desperate for it to all be alright and to be taken seriously and also that you are teetering on wanting there to be something wrong in order to explain things and desperately hoping you actually ARE being neurotic so you can fix that.

How do I know all this? Because you sound EXACTLY like me and how I was when I was at your stage. And I know that you have to FOCUS and stop wasting your time flogging the dead horses. Yes I know they are being paid to be alive, but you cannot beat life into them all the same.

:( You are right.

So I explain to school that as they can't help any further and as it is all my fault and DS behaviour remains perfect at school. I do not see the point of multi agency meeting.

I will continue to keep on touch with behavioural support via parent partnership and NHS appointments and sod the school.

If his behaviour gets worse at school or they want to invite in the Ed Psy, I will meet them WITH the Ed Psy to discuss results.

Wish them all the best luck with their specialised ASD unit currently being build at the school