feeling totally deflated and let down - SENDIST

[billiejeanbob]

Our long awaited hearing was yesterday for parts 2 &3 of dds statement. I spent 3k on witnesses, travel etc and not to mention the stress of the last year.
The LA were requesting that all of my indie (slt, ot dyslexia) provision and needs were removed from the statement via working document.
The judge had to go through the wd sentence by sentence and the LA were refusing everything, even bits in part 1!
there reasons were that I had paid my indies to assess and so the provision was based on this rather than need. the la had no evidence and were just time wasting by saying they didnt understand the technicality of the wording RE dds complex slt and ot needs.
they then came in after a break and requested an adjournment as they had no evidence, which the judge accepted .
so now the hearing has been adjourned until September and the LA are allowed to ask NHS slt and ot to comment on my indie reports abd submit as evidence.
I feel so deflated and like I have let dd down. due to paying for the indies as witnesses I now cant afford any private therapy and feel she is just being left to rot in ms with no support.
I got home from the hearing yesterday at 6 (hearing finished at 5) and dd was in mega meltdown mode as I wasnt there when she returned home from school. she was crying so much she couldn't catch her breath to breathe .
I had to practically drag her to school this morning to get her there and I feel awful. how can this be? I am scared what will happen to her mental health if this continues. she is already self harming and she is only 8
I feel like my world has been ripped apart tbh. how can I continue to take her to school, when it is destroying her?
I know need to decide between giving up now and ploughing all of my cash into tuition and ot (but cant afford the slt aswel) or save the money to pay for witnesses again.
I feel torn. what if I pay for the witnesses to attend again in September and I either lose the appeal or its adjourned again ?(quite likely as dds needs are complex and la are likely to refuse everything meaning the wd needs to be discussed word for word.)
To put the icing on the cake after discussion with my indie slt about transition to secondary she feels dd needs a certain indie specialist placement and due to location dd would need to board
there literally is not one school in my or surrounding LAs that will meet her needs. I feel like taking dd and leaving everything. why is life this hard?

I now homeschool . Could you ring IPSEA and see if the tribunal could order the LA to pay the witness costs of a 2nd hearing? After it's not at your request.

Omg I'm sorry this is awful :(.

Did you have an advocate/ help?

You must have been very unlucky with the judge, surely this is unacceptable way of doing things? What are the judge's initials?

Let transition fail and stop forcing her in.

Ime there needs to be evidence of failure.

By the time we went to tribunal transition had failed and ds1 was receiving EOTAS. I don't think we would have 'won' so easily if he weren't.

I have seriously considered HE but I also have a preschooler with additional needs, plus dd needs the social interaction from school. I just cant see how I can juggle it all so that it works.
if I were to self fund the tuition and ot this would have to be on top of school but again im not sure it would work as dd has complex sensory modulation issues so unless therapy will be delivered when she is alert enough to process it, it wont be effective.
I will pm you the initials of the judge.

triuble is keep transition is 2 years away, this tribunal is for provison within ms.

Who was the Judge?

Sadly this kind of thing does happen. There is no consistency. No doubt you're thinking 'but why me?'. You need to do the best you can to get through this.

Unfortunately the system is corrupt through and through, but, given it is the only system you had available to you please be proud of yourself for your efforts and sacrifices. These people will burn in Hell and your dd has documentary evidence of just how far you went to do right by her, are still going.

I know this is hard now. Have the very best summer you can. Pray that this Judge disappears somehow and you get a new different one and do follow up the request for costs.

will pm you Star.
we will also be having the same judge and panel at the next hearing

but tbh apart from the adjournment both the judge and the panel were really fair, as the LA had no case really as they had no evidence.

But how is it fair to delay provision for a child when there is so much evidence that she needs it against NO evidence with plenty of time to get it if there was some, that she doesn't?

Perhaps the next 'hearing' could be paperbased/telephone etc. Can you afford advocacy/legal advice?

But why on earth did the judge give the LA more time to get evidence? What's their excuse for not having done so before the hearing?

their excuse was that dd was discharged from NHS and they cant order the NHS to reassess her, so they were at a disadvantage.
the judge has now given them time to submit my indie reports to the NHS so that they can comment on them, but the NHS arent allowed to reassess dd due to the amount of assessment that has already taken place.
so im not sure what the hell the NHS can say about an ondie report when the last standardised assessment that they have done was in jan 2013!! ( this also showed scores below first percentile and dx dcd)

You will be able to ask for costs at the end, but obviously won't know if that will be successful. I don't know if you can ask now
We ended up with adjournment due to crucial witness being sick - we told tribunal and asked to adjourn, tribunal refused then we all got there and it was adjourned!
We asked our indi witnesses to waive their fee at advocate suggestion, which they did, advocate also waived fee. You could ask if they would do this if judge won't award costs

But that stuff about the NHS is absolute rubbish. The NHS has a statutory duty to co-operate. And anyway, they presumably employ their own educational psychologist, and could have gone to independent experts if the NHS really refused to play ball.

Which idiot judge was this?

I think you were unlucky with the judge - my LA tried this with 3 weeks to go to my hearing with my SALt report - judge said in a telephone hearing they could send the SALT report to the NHS SALT to read and comment on and wouldn't allow them any more time as they had had the same time as us - the NHS SALT then refused to comment because he was not known to them so they had to just accept my report. its frustrating that you've all been at the hearing including the witnesses for this to happen and like others have said whilst the messing around continues your daughter has been left in absolute limbo. I would like others have said ask for costs at the end and I would once the decision comes be minded to complain to the tribunal themselves

I do know someone who managed to the tribunal to pay the cost of her reports and got them to pay about £3k but it took her a lot of effort

OP, I'm curious about the judge, would you mind PMing me with the name or initials?

Did you have anyone to help you with the appeal?

Were you represented at the hearing? Did you get a chance to object to adjournment? Can you appeal? Late surprises place unrepresented parents at a distinct disadvantage. DS1 had been discharged and couldn't be seen by the NHS in time and so the LA got their own Indi reports.

yes maxwell gillott have been dealing with the appeal on my behalf and I was represented by an ipsea rep. we did strongly object to the adjournment on the basis that dd urgently needs ot (quote from report) and surely to adjourn would be denying that need further... the panel did take this into account and said that LA are not allowed a reassessment just NHS to comment on my indie reports.
today has been a very long painful day. dd woke this morning causing havoc around the house, hitting, kicking and general melting down. she has bitten the skin off around her fingers which is now infected. all morning she was urging and stimming shouting that she cant go to school. so I decided enough is enough and said she can stay at home with me. I still had to take other dcs to school and HT came over and asked why dd was not in. I just burst into tears, this is completely breaking me. I just dont know what to do for the best.

This is such a shitty situation that you just have to accept displays of strong emotion whenever they occur - even if that is in front of a HT

Take time to reassemble and take care of yourself. I have lovely big strawberries grown in my garden that would be perfect with and chocolate cake

I might have some myself - just had a very terse conversation re DS2s proposed/NIL that was posted 2nd class yesterday. They have refused to fax it to the school or give any details over the phone despite knowing that nobody will be home to receive the post as we are all at my mothers hospital bedside.

What can I say,but, bastards.

I'm afraid that's the trouble with SENDIST. Some of the judges are brilliant, but there are one or two who are dim and/or weak and there's not much anyone can do to prepare for that.

Might your GP be prepared to refer DD to a paediatrician who could give a report about her anxiety around school? You could then use that to get something like home tuition, maybe.

This is such a shitty situation that you just have to accept displays of strong emotion whenever they occur - even if that is in front of a HT

Take time to reassemble and take care of yourself. I have lovely big strawberries grown in my garden that would be perfect with and chocolate cake

I might have some myself - just had a very terse conversation re DS2s proposed/NIL that was posted 2nd class yesterday. They have refused to fax it to the school or give any details over the phone despite knowing that nobody will be home to receive the post as we are all at my mothers hospital bedside.

What can I say,but, bastards.

billiejean Keep a diary of this stuff including harassment from the headteacher. Officially you might not be allowed to submit it in document form but you'll be allowed to talk to it/read it, which you need to point out when you request submission of evidence of her demise due to the delay.

to be fair I think the HT was just generally concerned. Its been a very tough few days

This is really shitty. I'm so sorry.

Could you also keep a diary/journal of your DD's moods/ behaviour/anxiety etc. Then submit as late evidence for the 2nd day of the hearing?

I think the reason that I am finding it so difficult at the moment is because dd is really struggling at the moment. im looking forward to spending the weekend as a family, in the sun

Billiejean, I'm so sorry to hear what you are going through. Its truly awful the stress children and their families have to go through to get the help they need. The LA should be thoroughly ashamed of their behaviour and attitude.

You are doing a fantastic job for your child, keep going and I hope you get what you need xxx