School are SO sure of how wrong I am, in my ASD concerns about DS

[Babieseverywhere]

Sigh, two more emails from the Senco prior to the Tuesday assessment from ASD Outreach person, who is going to the school to assess DS.

First email said she had been in touch with the behavioural people so they can act the moment they can ( i.e. when the ASD outreach person does not take him onto caseload on Tuesday).

Second email sending information about a local Triple P parenting course that the behavioural team think would be very good for my husband and I to attend.

I understand she is trying to get the help for us that she thinks DS needs and sadly I agree that the Outreach team won't see DS difficulties between Senco telling them there is nothing to worry about and DS exception masking abilities at school.

But I am so sad that she didn't wait until AFTER the Tuesday assessment, couldn't the school just pretend to share my concerns until then, instead of rubbing my nose into how wrong I am ahead of time ? :(

I am also so angry about the parenting course suggestion. I knew it would come up at some point and/ have already enrolled on online Triple P course to prempt this requirement. But I expected the request to come from the comm paed who didn't know me and my family. How can the Senco think I need a parenting course when she sees my oldest two girls behave so beautifully at school on a daily basis.

PS. I am still awaiting salt, hearing and a Comm Paed appointments, so if things go as I suspect they will on Tuesday, I will be fighting on to see if anyone can see what I see in DS.

Ironically another mother at our school, asked me if I had considered looking at getting my DS assessed (her DS is further on the dx route and the school are supporting her) she said our children are like ''peas in a pod" behaviour wise when my DS went to hers for a play date. The only differences her child is rougher at school, whereas my child internalises everything and then comes home and lets it all out !

Right, I will be sincere, happy to be educated but experienced and educated mother, let's see what I can do.

Our morning routine is as follows.

1. Eat breakfast (already laid out)
2. Brush teeth
3. Get dressed (already laid out on order and reward of 4 if he gets dressed quickly)
4. Computer time.

How the hell can I streamline that. He is up and dressed by 5 am and plays computers until everyone else gets up at 7am

You'll be told he's being expected to give up computer time to go to school, which makes school aversive.

No idea if that is true, but that is what you'll be told and they'll refuse to move on until you promise eliminate the computer as everything will be blamed on that.

Fine, That means me getting up at 5am with a distressed child. If three hours of screaming before school helps, I will try it once. ..not sure it will work though, lol

Might try it Friday and see how it goes badly

LOL. Do it the day the behavioural person comes.

You could try stopping computer time half and hour before you have to go out and replacing it by a limited but enjoyable thing like a nice snack or a sensory activity if he likes being squeezed or running up and down the garden 10 times or something, so he is transitioning from that to school rather than the computer!?

The thing is, you might improve his behaviour at home but none of that changes his actual school experience. That does still need to be dealt with.

I like your thinking...He likes the trampoline or having his back rubbed. Certainly I will try a transitional activity between computers an school run time.

For ds, he gets an hour of screen time each day (under certain conditions). He earns an additional free 5 minutes however if he transitioned OFF the screen when I told him without making a fuss, on his previous time.

It took a while for him to get it, but it works now.

Worth a try

I will try bridging activities from tomorrow.

Thank goodness we had a relative good school run this mining, long may it last.

I also rung up the behavioural team and spoke to a lovely lady, who may be my new best friend ;) Who said I sounded like I knew how to handle my son difficulties well and suggested I rang Parent s Partnership as they would help me be more forceful with the school (?) I did read their website and am no nearer understanding what they actually do.

Any how, if the other lady is as nice as the one I spoke to today, ticking the behavioural boxes might be less painful than I thought it was going to be.

Parent partner's bloke was lovely too.

Also sent off behavioural questionaire and requested copy from school too...I am on a roll. :)

Behaviour team were still too busy to talk to me Friday.

I will be ringing every day to update them on how the school run is working for us and with a kind respectful attitude, ask for suggestions I could use to get improvements in DS behaviour.

If DS has a behavioural issue, I want it sorted asap if they feel school should help too, I want the behavioural team to tell them

Parent partner's want a meeting with the school. A good idea as I want to pinpoint DS EXACT behaviour on class.