Can't cope anymore I don't want him

[Sonumb]

Ds 5 has become unbearable I can hardly stand to look at him let alone be around him .
I can't parent him I have tried everything and I quit , its not supposed to be this hard my child is not supposed to beat me up & curse at me .
I have no help his Dad works 7 days a week & I can't leave the house with him , he doesn't sleep more than a few hours and hasn't since he was born .
He can escape out of every pram/reins/harness won't hold hands and just runs and runs and won't stop .
I'm taking him to the doctors tomorrow but I have zero hope for any kind of help from them.
So my only option is to tell Social services to come and get him

Agreeing that it's the sleep deprivation that's pushing you over the edge. Both of mine are so much more difficult when I'm fuzzy headed and more reactive than pro-active.

There's lots of good stuff here, Again, it might help you persuade people that you're not clueless, just overwhelmed.
www.challengingbehaviour.org.uk/

Sonumb perhaps take him out for the day, or would that be too much for you?

Their is no way I can take him out as he is too impossible to control & also its peeing it down

Sonumb It has just started raining where I am. You need some help and support isn't there anyone you could call over? And when did this behaviour start?

I have nobody apart from Dp and Dm & my Dm will need a few days to recover from yesterday .
He has always been difficult/different but this behaviour at the moment started about 10 weeks ago & has just got worse as time goes on

We have Thunder & Lightening now

Sonumb. I am so sorry that I can't give more advice

Jacye

He won't go anywhere busy so say I take him to indoor play if their are more than five people he has to go home , he really can't handle crowds at all .
I nipped in to town with him the other day to get a bit of shopping & he must of had at least 4 mektdowns I just ended up sitting on a bench while he hit me because some children were watching him .
If anybody so much as glances at him he has a meltdown , he won't interact with school friends out of school he just tries to hide behind me if we bump in to anybody so can't even arrange play dates etc .
He can go to school friends parties as long as I keep reminding him , telling where it is etc so he knows .

Dp works 7.00am til 2pm & then 4.30pm til 8.30pm every day apart from weds when he works 6pm til 2am so when he is home he helps with the housework & Ds but sometimes Ds won't let Dp near him

Sonumb

My son is autistic so I can relate to some of the things you have written. Although he is never violent, he too hates crowds or places with unfamiliar faces, so me taking him shopping, for days out, abroad etc is a complete no no.

Our routine is school then home, weekends and school holidays are spent in the house.

Unlike your son he doesn't interact with his peers inside school at all, and as much as he gets invited to parties even speaking about him attending them upsets him.

You are not alone Sonumb things will get better.

I live in a very busy holiday resort so from June-November the Town area etc are a no go with Ds, I go shopping while he is at school as I can't go with him .
He won't go to all parties sometimes I have had to ring and cancel last thing .
He is due to start beavers on the 7th of July but I'm really starting to doubt whether I should take him .
He was obsessed with Thomas the Tank for 4 years & now he is obsessed with Batman but not as much as he was Thomas Tank , he wont let me get rid of his Thomas stuff or anything he tends to Hoard stuff

Polter your making absolute sense and it sounds awesome but my Ds is very straight laced/matter of fact kinda boy & is often telling me to grow up & stop being embarrassing (I often threaten to pick him up from school in a onesie )
On a good day he will sit & watch his batman DVDs over and over again not that I agree with him watching the films as they are a bit to grown up for him but tbh at the moment I'll do anything for ten minutes peace

I miss when he just used to sit & play with his trains for hours at a time and wouldn't let anybody disturb him , he would play from when he got up til bedtime he was that obsessed , I should of realised then that he was different

I might try a reward chart again & I need to get him a clock so he knows what times what erx & get him back in to his routine

Thanks everybody for letting me wobble on

Hey Sonumb, just checking up on you.. How are things? Have they gotten any better?

He is fast asleep thankyou piriton I needed a rest

He has all the batman imaginext sets , every batman film & cartoon , I need to get him some books as he likes books .
I'll have a try at looking at bats with him and see if he shows an interest as they are adorable & we see loads where I am as I'm next to a cemetery .
He can't work a games console to save his life

He slept til 4 which is good for him .

He is blind as a bat & refuses to wear his glasses so his coordination is getting worse

He is certainly different

Couple of quick thoughts - noise cancelling headphones. And a pop up tent filled with his favourite things and a duvet/blanket to wrap round him, as a 'safe zone'. When I'm in any sort of big crowd/noisy place, something that stops the extra noise really helps. They're not expensive now. Also sunglasses are worth a try - or a baseball cap. Anything to cut out extra overhead lighting and the 'electric shock' effect of eye contact from people. Keep the house as free from perfume/bleach/freshener smells as possible. And let him wear very comfortable clothes. See if some of that makes a difference.

Amber Good idea with the headphones I'll have to get some
He has always worn sunglasses while out since I can remember as he has a real aversion to the sun
I'll try the comfy clothes as he has a real fondness for crocks atm and will wear them everywhere he goes
He doesn't do well with tents as he doesn't like enclosed spaces

He (and you) sound fabulous.

My son has autism and dyspraxia. Blardy hard work but he's just a quirky sensitive lad. I can't imagine him without his quirks.

Do you have any support groups in your area? I found talking to parents of children with similar diagnosis really helpful. It made it 'normal'.

I have found a few local groups that I'm going to ring this week