Is there any way to help an asd child get his hair cut?

[Confusedaboutstatements]

My DS is 3 and although not yet diagnosed it's pretty obvious he is going to get this diagnosis soon.

He will absolutely not get his hair cut. I have tried cutting bits off in his sleep but it just looks ridiculous. I don't mind it long but he gets really angry when it's windy and it moves his hair. And also he hates having it brushed.

Last week we watched you tube videos of haircuts and I asked him if he would get his hair cut, he said "cluck ma hair" ( cut my hair) and went and got his shoes. All the way there he seemed excited about getting his hair cut but when we walked into the barbers meltdown. He was shaking poor little thing. So I took him home.

I don't know whether to try again or just leave it. Does anyone have any ideas? He has delayed expressive and receptive language so bribery wouldn't work nor would reasoning.

When my son was little we must have gone into the hairdressers at least 4 times before he actually got it cut. When we saw a consultant, I knew she understood because she got down to his level (he was 4 then) and just said 'we don't know why, but it's really not nice having a hair cut is it?'
From age 9 he's had it shaved off twice a year, looks like a squaddie and not what we would choose but it keeps the peace and looks ok while it grows back.

Hi, I too had a hard time getting my son's haircut when he was young, my DS is 14 now and now he tends to tolerate it but I only trim his hair if I think he's in the right mood. I found that it was the scissors that he found frightening so I brought a pair of hair clippers from Argos and he was alot more tolerant of them as time went on and also you get a better cut if your doing it yourself and if he's had enough you can leave it for while and then try again later, I use to find it really stressful but not now.
I also brought a book called "need a trim jim" my son thought it was funny. Hope this helps.

I have heard of someone who had great success with body brushing - child had first haircut with no problems after she started doing this.

I do not recommend ds2's solution of cutting it himself - the result was interesting to say the least

I have also heard positive things about body brushing.

Factual bit

The receptors in the skin for light touch are the same ones as the pain receptors, many children with Asd have sensory dysfunction ie their senses are confused and their brains dont sort information very well. so the light touch of the hair dresser can feel like terrible pain

Brushing the skin can "switch on" the receptors and help the brain to work out what kind of touch it is.

Before hair brushing try firmly stroking the hair and scalp, this works for us when brushing Dd3's hair.

The thing I really struggle with at the hairdressers is the smell of all the sprays and shampoos all jumbled up together. I have my hair cut at home as I just hate the whole hairdresser experience.

Good luck

I will google body brushing in a min and give it a try. We have been given things to do like rolling him in blankets etc by the speech therapist to help with sensory integration.

I will also try in the bath, no idea how to cut it so it looks half decent though! Could watch some videos first though.

This is what he currently looks like. Where would I start? I like it longer but he doesn't. I'm wondering if I just tidy it up a bit it might be ok because it won't move as much in the wind?

We had success with a children only hairdressers. She is often empty when we go, has a tv playing cartoons in front of the cutting chair and gives each child a pack of sweets (10p haribo or lolly) if they are well behaved.

No funny smells, relaxing as noone else there. I had her cut 1inch off my DS hair every visit until his long hair, was a more boyish cut. My daughters love her too as she plaits their hair and puts glitter in too.

So my suggestion look for your local kid only hairdresser and find out when they are quiet.

Have you any mobile hairdressers in your area that will come out to your home?
Or could you have a go with clippers yourself on a fairly long setting so that he doesn't look like a skinhead?

I have exactly the same issue with my 4 Yr old DS and recently bought a decent pair of hairdressing scissors from Amazon (only cost about £12 but the reviews were really good) and a second hand copy of 'Hairdressing for Dummies' which gives you a good basic idea of how haircuts work. My DS has curly hair too and I found that once I knew a bit more about what I was supposed to do I could do a fairly decent job while he was sleeping. I just took a tiny bit off all over each time over a few nights. Then I bribed him heavily to let me do a few snips in the day. The trick with curly hair is to remember to comb the hair out at about a 90 degree angle as you cut, rather than straight down so you get a more layered look. I haven't completely given up on taking him to a salon but feeling more confident myself in having a go has taken the pressure off for a while.

It depends on what aspect of having a haircut troubles him. I found for ds he hated the feeling of hair in his face while it was being cut, and down his clothes afterwards. This meant that having haircuts in a shop exacerbated his anxiety and made matters worse.

We used clippers at home too. It meant he could have his haircut in his underwear, limiting the amount of hair in his clothing, and could cover his face with a towel to stop it getting in his face. They straight upstairs for a shower once it was finished.

After a while when he was used to that, I brought in a mobile hairdresser who cuts both our hairs at the same time. As before, he can go straight up for a shower afterwards so the irritating bit is removed.

But ultimately you have to find solutions to what bothers your own child about haircuts. It's a unique experience for everyone so it depends on his personal sensitivities and anxiety.

We found a hairdresser that used to work with children with ASD. He's fantastic! He goes at Ds pace and is really understanding.

We cracked it by going to one of those children's salons and finding an understanding stylist. However a year later it closed down, but I was friends with her by then so I used to take him to her house for a cut. She then emigrated, but he's ok now so long as no clippers or hairdryers. The place we go to now is a walk in place that just does cuts on damp hair so no sudden noise of blowdriers.

I use bribery with my DS. Do you do this?