Dd2 s increasingly violent meltdowns

[autumnsmum]

Hello everyone sorry to whinge as I know everyone has a lot on their plate but dd2 is worrying me a lot . She is 4 and has moderate autism and attends a sp sch she is verbal . Once every few days we get a meltdown and they are getting worse last night she didn't want to go to bed and got so angry she snapped the end off her cot bed ! I know there's no
Magic answer but just getting my worries off my chest has helped thanks if you've got this far

and hugs.

It's so hard to see them out of control isn't it?
DS trashed his room the other day, ripped wallpaper off and threw his chair at the door.

We're struggling too with finding a way to channel his anger in a less destructive way.

Keep posting, there's always someone here to listen.

Thank you that's really helpful to hear in not the only one

Hi autumnsmum. Sorry to hear it is difficult. I have no answers either my ds has very aggressive meltdowns and if he's near me will try to hurt me too. I use to get quite upset when he tried to hurt me, which of course made it worse. Now I remove all stimulus and keep quiet.

The only thing I've found useful recently is as well as noting triggers then being aware if there has been anything that's unsettled him in the previous few hours he is like a smouldering fire that can be so easily reignited.

But it's so hard when they are kicking off about stuff you have to do like bedtime! We have it with dressing...i dread it every day. And he's a bit of a stripper so I normally have to redress him 5 times a day!

Thank you skimming I know you have a lot to deal with as well dd2 is a stripper

It's funny with ds though I don't know if others are like this too, he is so happy and polite but when his switch goes he's like a different child

I can tell by DS's face when he walks out of school what type of day he's had.
If he's got a face on I don't ask questions and let him go on the PC when he gets home to chill out.

Doesn't always work mind!

Thank you accio and polter what had happened dp had let dd2 have a late sleep , I was settling her and she asked for a particular toy she followed me and decided she didn't want to go back to bed . I carried her to the bedroom and the meltdown started . Tonight has been calmer but I can't believe her strength

Superhuman strength when they get going isn't it?!

Glad tonight was calmer for you all.

Hi autumn sorry to hear you're having a difficult time with meltdowns. My dd is 4 too and we have rapidly found her meltdown unmanageable as she's so big and strong now. Its been a shock and we are now applying for funding to get a safe space or cosyfit to give her a safe place to be when this happens. I think it will reduce stress for all of us to know shell be safe whatever her mood at least while at home. We also want to try using a diary to see if we can work out her triggers - I'm not optimistic that we will. I'm also going to try visual timetable - very simple one about what's now and what's next because I think its anxiety about the world and what's happening that's creating some of this behaviour

Firstimer thank you for the update the safe space seems a good idea . I'm just so scared at the thought of this level of anger in an older child . I think I will speak to the behaviour team at dd2s school . Firs timer again I hope you get the help you need