Schools for yr7 girl with Asperger's (SouthEast London)

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DD(12) started secondary school this year. We applied before she got her
Asperger's diagnosis so at that point we weren't looking at SEN provision. Basically she has struggled from day one and has been selectively mute at school. The anxiety has resulted in her having an extended period of being unable to attend school (I hate the term school refusal) and missing much of her education this year.

She has been assessed for a statement and we should hear very soon whether she has got one. The school didn't support this initially as they keep saying she is fine at school despite us repeatedly telling them that she isn't and this is reflected in her behaviour at home. They just don't seem very interested in her welfare.

We're now very doubtful if she will be able to go back to this school. She is very academically able and musically gifted and we are having problems finding a school (mainstream or specialist) that will be able to support both her social and emotional needs and also challenge her academically. Can anyone out there suggest anywhere that fits the bill in or around SE London? We need to find somewhere very soon or we are going to end up home educating.

Prendergast in Hilly Fields are good for music, no idea for SEN
Thomas Tallis Kidbrooke - have a rep as good at both
Bonus Pastor Downham - good SEN support but no idea on music
Have a look at Trinity in Lee, pastoral care is good and it's very small

Avoid St Ursula's and St Thomas More.

Avoid all Greenwich secondaries like the plague inc Thomas Tallis - I did a stint of my PGCE there and was NOT impressed by staff room attitudes. Deaf unit kids are looked after, not so any other SN's by a long shot.

A friend's son on the spectrum has blossomed at Deptford Green after a grim time at Primary, so much so I'd recommend at least going on a look see. Addy and Stanhope has a dedicated specialist teaching unit for communication needs - again the ASD children I've met who attend there seem to be really happy. I also like the outlook Addy kids have - it's a school that churns out nice people ya know? I'd expect her to receive more understanding and compassion from her hormonal adolescent peers than is typical at a London comp if she goes to Addy's. Utterly horrid building if she has sensory issues though.

In the private sector Riverston has a good rep for HFA and has several statemented kids on role from local LA's. Very caring, nurturing school. It might also be worth taking a look round St Saviours and St Olaves, a state girls school at the Elephant & Castle - this used to be really lovely and nurturing (my God Daughter went there but she's now 21 & I don't know any younger cohorts, so I may be getting a bit out of date).

Spectrum kids are all so different from each other it's very hard to make a blanket statement that anywhere would suit any child iykwim.

The Blackheath Conservatoire has a truly wicked music programme including GCSE & A level music on a Saturday if you can't find a school that accommodates her passion. There's bound to be a programme there to suit her whatever her musical passion! Lewisham college (Daniel and natasha beddingfield fame) is superb for SN's and does a really good music technologist programme - worth looking at to inspire her for 16+.

Second Lewisham college being excellent and Bonus Pastor do link days with them.

Boc how long ago was your time at Tallis, it was on my list to look at for ds as I'd heard good reports about SEN dept.

5 years - just don't, (still have a buddy on staff who says attitudes haven't changed) I have a friend who fosters a kid on the spectrum at the moment. he's lucky and has been very kindly babysat, but hasn't learned a darn thing in the 4 years he's been there. It's fine if you have a VERY passive child you just want parked somewhere for free childcare 6 hours a day, but I got the impression when I met you that your ambitions for your child aimed a little higher than that?

Thanks for the suggestions, lots of ideas to look into.
Bochead -Thomas Tallis looks good on website, would you be able to give a bit more detail about the issues?
Am doing a day of serious research tomorrow. There must be something out there for DD.

Crosspost there Boc. Sounds like one to avoid then.

The key issue is appallingly low aspirations for achievement rather than deliberate nastiness iyswim. So long as the child is quiet and biddable then everything is considered a great success - whether they understand anything that's going on, or are learning anything isn't even on the radar. IF behavior becomes an issue they'll be forced via a managed move into one of the areas EBSD schools.

The child my friend fosters would have been moved years ago if he were her child, but its so much harder with a foster kid to make any waves as they can just be moved onto a more "suitable" foster home, & she loves him iyswim. His progress has stalled since primary almost totally though and she's not happy about it, but doesn't have the same rights we do.

Do you want your child babysat or educated? It's a question to ask yourself as different schools have VERY different attitudes to SN kids. Some think they can achieve anything with the right help, others think you are crazy for even asking if an aspie could ever get any sort of exam pass, and would rather spend the allocated funds on the vegetable patch.

Cheers Boc Tallis was on my reserve list for secondary schools as I hadn't seen it in person and it seems very big - now it's crashed and burned off my list.

Yes Boc as you know Im not one for allowing baby sitting of ds in school. It was for this reason that Riverston has come off my list. I love Riverston, the children and their ethos, but I found they lowered their ambitions for the children academically.

I need a good all rounder, supportive in SEN, good pastoral care and good academics. After I visit a school, I try and find parents of children with SEN and get their opinions. I have 8 separate parents of children with SEN, saying that Bonus Pastor is very good, so I'd say its worth a look sugar