When is the right time to change schools?

[sbm78]

Hi, I hope someone can help me because I really do not know what to do for the best.

We have moved 5 miles away from the school that DS2 (yr3) and DD1 (yr1) attend. I am currently applying for DS2 to be assessed on academic and behavioural grounds which has been supported by the school. Just waiting to hear.

As we have moved I'm thinking about the future, we are looking to stay put where we are now. Ideally I would like to move the children to schools nearby where we live so they make friends locally and so when they attend secondary school they will have solid friendships.

Part of the problems with DS2 is his social behaviour, the school put on his application that he has no close friends and that he tends to obsess about certain children until they get fed up with him (heartbreaking)! I'm worried about moving him, worried about if he'll make friends at the new school, how it will affect him. But at the same time he's not got any "best" friends at this school. I'm also concerned about the relationship he's built up with his teacher and how he'll react with having to build another teacher/pupil bond.

DD1 will cope with a move, we have no issues or concerns really there apart from obviously taking her away from her friends now. Luckily I'm good friends with her best friend so they can still be in touch.

Please help, do you have experience in this? What do you think?

Hi
I may not be of use but I'll share my experience.
I have a 7 yr old with Tourette's syndrome and a 5yr old boy who apparently is borderline ASD. We moved area and school last September
So they started at the start of the new term.
My youngest had major sensory issues and my daughter has major anxiety issues.
Both have made me so proud how they have handled the transition..

However the school they were at refused to acknowledge they had problems. The new school has been nothing short of amazing
They have pit some much in place and had assessments from school action and continue to meet their ever changing needs..
I feel your torment at making the decision to move them, and I tormented myself and felt so guilty as my daughter had a big attachment to one girl only and still talks about her now ( we are arranging to meet up)
But I know in the long run it was the right thing to do.

Like you said moving up to secondary school will be better for them too.

Others may have different opinions experiences that may be more helpful.

Just wanted to add my experience. It's so hard to see what they go through on a daily basis especially if they thrive on the routine they have now.. But we have managed it and I thought it would be truly horrendous.

Thank you for replying :-) It's really difficult isn't it knowing what to do for the best.

The school we are at now have been good (not great) with trying to support my DS. But they are happy there.

I think I need to start looking at schools.

Has anyone heard of something called "Hard to place protocol"?? Thats what a local school said will happen with my DS? I don't want the kids to end up in different schools.

I'm sorry I haven't heard of that phrase or term, but I would visit the school you intend on moving them too, and have a chat. Find out what their strategies and policies are regarding any child with additional needs.

'Inclusive to all' and all that...

We have had school action involved and my daughter has ieps in place etc.. But I know depending on schools/area these sadly do not always mean anything.
My older brother has three children on the spectrum, and the youngest two are at a school that has a specific autism resource section. However they are refusing to acknowledge the children's needs as they are apparently 'fine' when they are there. A very frustrating term.
Although they see the meltdowns and aggressive behaviour from my niece in the car park in the morning and pm. They have turned a bling eye.

My older sister is struggling with her school. My nephew has been out of school since September due to selective mutism and mental health issues and the school have been less than accommodating at weaning him back in. I have just moved my children from this school as they wouldn't acknowledge my daughters Tourette's.

So I suppose I'm saying sadly whatever you have on paper it can be a constant battle to get the right help at different schools.

Sorry if I'm not being helpful , but I would definitely visit the school
Have any paper evidence/ reports to hand too.

Thank you so much. I hope you have better luck with your new school x