caf meeting OT undermined everything

[POPPYGIRL3]

hi there any advice will be appreciated we had our first caf meeting for our son he has hemi CP and ASD , He left mainstream school last nov this ot never had any involvement with my son from birth only through a dcd clinic when he was 8 where they said he had global motor skill diff left sided weakness , hyper mobile joints, dyspraxia, but the paed consultant would not give a written diagnosis and said he would see him in a year, I was not going to wait another year so then got a second opinion out of the borough with a top consultant who diagnosed my son with cp then 8 months down the line got a second diagnosis of ASD , his new school asked if I wanted a caff set up as they had been no OT involvement at all despite our consultant sending urgent refferals through , then at the caff meeting the OT came and said she could not see any problems with our son , nothing at all and then went on to state that she believed he didn't have ASD only anxietys due to our house move!! my god this woman has never saw our son and has no idea what we have been through as a family sleepless nights nightmares, frightened of being alone , fears , becomes agitated, repetiveness, routines, collects weird items , hitting his siblings and shouting and screaming at home at us , everything has to be his way.... no sooner he comes out of the taxi home he starts telling us he has a headache then we get everything that's happened during the day and all that's upset him then the anger starts its terrible, trying to settle him is a nightmare , as were told to get off him he doesn't like being touched. our son cant abide routine changes, has to know exactly whats happening otherwise he goes off on one ,, they don't see this at school the temper ect then we as parents are questioned about this as if we are lying , which I don't find acceptable , for a OT who's had nothing to do with my son to stand and question his diagnosis is shocking, we cant take him to supermarkets ect as he does not like crowded places, any advice on this please xxx

Sorry your going through this cafs are stressful enough with out people like the ot there. The first thing i think would be to contact parnet partnership they can allocate you an advocate to attend meetings. The can't speak for you there but they will take notes and talk you through the whole process and help bring forward any issues. You can try google or your local LA to find out the number.

Secondly if you know where the ot is based i would write a letter of complaint and explain what has happened during the caf. The ot should have made it clear in the meeting that she hasn't atcually seen your son personally and the caf was her first contact with you. I would also ask for future meetings that that ot does not attend and ask for your ds to be passed onto someone else.

You can also tell the caf leader and put it in writing who you don't want to attend future meetings and why. You are able to do that i have in the past when a hv stated that it was ds3 not ds2 who was most likely asd and she made what i felt inappropriate comments about my dp.

The caf meetings are supposed to be so everyone involved can make sure you and your ds have all the support you need if at any point during the meetings you feel someone has said anything that is incorrect then tell them you don't agree and why. As i was told its not you being awkward its you making sure all the information presented is correct.

Our last OT was a @%£$* $%£, if you get my drift.

I would suggest speaking to her manager. She will have to give you her/his contact details.

Ours explained that the woman was the only one in the area and we had little choice, however, the manager was on-side and we tolerated her with that knowledge.

You could also consider talking to your MP

Good luck!