5.6yo DD still drops to the pavement and refuses to walk when she fancies it. Any techniques for minimising / stopping it?

[Meglet]

If 5yo DD doesn't walk to walk, not because she's tired or we're going anywhere boring, then she doesn't. She holds my hand and drops like a dead weight. I'm utterly fed up with having to haul her down the road . Without the hand holding she tries to run off or into the road.

Rewards (time playing in the Apple shop / snacks in town etc) and sanctions don't work. She is quite happy lying on the pavement stopping me from going anywhere. I'm a LP and refuse to be stuck in the house all the time, sorry if that sounds stroppy but I'll go loopy staying inside all weekend with the dc's.

She has her first paed appointment in May by the way, so we might make some headway then.

This was actually the very first thing my ABA tutors worked on and they cracked it in a day. It is probably easier for tutors than a mum though.
Here is what they did

• excitedly, let's go out and get ice cream

• out they went, me observing
• as soon as he sees "no car" he drops to floor like lead weight
• tutor looks away, ignores, though holds hand securely so child safe
• waits out the tantrum
• and waits
• ignores screaming/crying, no eye contact
• only when child is quietening down, eye contact resumed: "let's go get that ice cream!"
• and repeat
• so my boy learned "nothing fun happens when I do all the crying/lead weight stuff, but when I do the walking stuff I get lots of positive attention and an ice cream"

I was so so not wanting him to be in an oversized pram, and was killing my back carrying him up the road, as he was a big boy even at 3.

But it just took one day, and he walks round with us everywhere now,

Good luck!

polter I sold our huge 3 wheeler last year, assuming I wouldn't need it once she started school. oh how I miss having a buggy! I am tempted to get another one.

sickof It's reassuring to know the experts can help with it. And yes, I think another adult would have more luck than I do. DD is more than capable of long walks, and she was one of only two reception children who ran the whole sports relief mile the other week. It's not like she's lacking in energy.

yy, I'm not very bright and breezy these days . Too much to do and too much to remember, on not much sleep.

Mum and my stepdad are actually moving back to my town so they'll be on the doorstep in a few months time. They're only 15 miles away at the moment, and help 3/4 days a week but I need more support. It might buy me more time to find ways to help DD. I feel so bloody awful that I don't have the time or energy to deal with her properly at the moment.

I take my ds most places on his micro scooter. The one that does up to age 12 (I think). I put the handle bar up to its highest level and just walk along with one hand on the handle pulling him along. It is brilliant, no more carrying ds and we can get everywhere quite quickly. I think it also makes him feel close to me so it is comforting for him. With my ds the not walking is probably sensory related. It is to do with the noise and how busy the place is and how anxious he is feeling.

We also tackled this through ABA techniques. We still get the lying on pavement when she is hungry and tired. So yes, it has to be tackled when there are no other pressures like school run etc. can school help?

We are now also trying the scooter because she still can't walk long distances(over a mile, is that normal for 4 yr olds?).

I have this problem with ds2, who is almost 8. There's far more than not wanting to walk involved. The route to school is littered with triggers for obsessive behaviours and he has a brother i need to keep in my sight.

for the time being, it's the gigantic buggy all the way.

I use a buggy for dd2 who's 4 it's just safer and I can't lift her if she flops plus we live in London so if she bolts on a road it could be fatal . Salondon I think not being able to walk that far at 4 is quite common

DD has a micro scooter. It does help on the school run actually. But it's a pain to take to town, too many roads and people to crash into. I don't want to be that parent chasing a scooting child around the supermarket. She has a tendency to run off when I'm shopping, she could do it twice as fast on a mini micro.

I had not thought of that Meglet when I was recommending a scooter. But a child scooting away or in a shop would not be good!

My ds finds it difficult to scoot so he just stands on it while I hold the handle and pull /push it. If he didn't do this I would have to get a big buggy for him.

tacal I've seen kids scooting around big shops, it does look like fun but probably an accident waiting to happen.

We're off to the shops in a bit. I'm going to try and think outside the box and find a way of making the journey less stressful.

good luck! I hope it goes well. There have been so many times I have wanted/needed to go to the shops but not been able to because of ds refusing or because I knew he would make it far too stressful.