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Cerebral Palsy support

11 replies

Tommy · 09/03/2004 15:56

My friend has just found out today that her son (25 months) has cerebral palsy. We knew something was not right since he can't walk and isn't talking yet. What can we (group of Mums in first time Mums' group) do to support her and help him?
Any thoughts and comments gratefully received.

OP posts:
chatee · 09/03/2004 16:03

be there for her....don't ignore the cerebral palsy....treat her the same and her ds...tell her about mumsnet as there are a few mums(me included)with children with cp.....help her find out what benefits she is entitled too...what support she can receive from health/education services....

doormat · 09/03/2004 16:07

Tommy this will hopefully help your friend with information.
Also like chatee says just be there for her
hope this helps

doormat · 09/03/2004 16:08

btw the link is for the scope website

misdee · 09/03/2004 16:15

dont treat the kid differently now he has a disgnosis. he is still the same child, but now with a disability that has been dx. i treat my neice and nephew the same as my own kids and they both have CP. he will probably be having lots of physio, hospital appointments and check ups, so being there to help at these times would be good. yes, help with form filling, and point her to mumsnet

fairydust · 09/03/2004 16:56

Just be normal - my dd has cerebal palsy and one thing we found is that when we told friends they acted as if it was some sort of diease there child could catch -

Offer to talk if she wants even if she just talks n you listen i felt as if my whole world had calaspted.

Does she have internet access???

If so tell her to come on here - if it wasn't for Lou33 and Thomcat letting have a moan just lately i would have found it hard to cope it's nice to just have someone and i think it's fantastic that your making this effort.

lou33 · 09/03/2004 17:34

Definitely don't treat the mum or baby as if everything is now changed. Mum will be grieving for the child she thought she had, and coming to terms with the news, and this can take a LONG time, but she will need you to be the same supportive friends she had before diagnosis ( which sounds like you are).

I am sure I am stating the obvious, but don't say things like "what a shame" etc. As a mum of a 3 year old with cp, I can say, yes it is, but I don't want ANYONE feeling sorry for ds or our family. He is a gorgeous little person who just happens to have some limitations, but then so do many many people with no special needs. Accept that her son will develop at a different rate to yours and your friends children, but don't be worried about telling her achievements in your own child. She will feel saddened for her child, but will still be delighted for you and yours.

Don't pretend his cerebral palsy doesn't exist, but don't see him only through his disability.

Get her the forms for claiming Disability Living Allowance, and any other support networks they need.

Most of all, just be there for her. Good luck, you sound lovely.

Fd, shucks .

Tommy · 09/03/2004 21:12

Thanks everyone for your messages and support. I'll keep you posted. I don't think my friend has internet access except at work and she's on maternity leave at the moment with DS2 - she can come here and surf though. I'll mention it and all of you kind people to her tomorrow!

OP posts:
dottee · 09/03/2004 21:47

I agree about supporting her with things like filling in forms such as Disability Living Allowance. No-one told me about that until dd with cp was aged 3 and a half and the form's so long winded and can be upsetting especially when you're having to say what the child is capable of doing.

Also, there's Invalid Care Allowance if mum's entitled to it. Another website which may be of interest is www.yourable.com (sorry girls, can't do the link - dp's been doing things at this PC and the keyboard's up the swannee!)

doormat · 09/03/2004 21:51

HERE it is dottee

doormat · 09/03/2004 21:52

hang on wrong one I will do it again

doormat · 09/03/2004 21:53

no it is the right one

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