Proposed statement- content ok but badly organised, should I just leave it?

[popgoestheweezel]

From the first look at ds' proposed statement I thought it was rubbish, but after reading it through a couple of times the content is actually OK. The organisation of the information though is very poor- for a start his needs are described in a random order and it's all just one enormous paragraph!
All the reports had subheadings of different areas of difficulty but it seems the writer read them all and then just jotted down everything they could remember without any consideration for the reader.
I have an urge to just re-write the whole thing (into something that is actually comprehensible) but will this ruffle feathers? We have approval for special school, so I know its not as important as it would be if he was staying in mainstream, wwyd?

The main thing is that all the difficulties are described in Part 2 and all the specific support for each of the Part 2 needs is described and quantified in Part 3.

If it really is only an organistaional issue then you could ask the LA to rearrange it to make it easier for those involved with him both now and in the future to read with ease.

If that's all that's wrong with it and LA say 'NO' I wouldn't die in a ditch over it.