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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Original poster

Minor hand holding please!

26 replies

Nerfmother · 03/01/2014 11:47

Ds is going to secondary in September. He has aspergers and OCD type behaviours and waiting for treatment from camhs. I am so worried about him at secondary (not being there) in terms of getting there and socialising.
Today, his big sister has taken him on the bus into town to go windows shopping and for lunch (she is very savvy and fifteen) and I'm really nervous! She has his autism alert card, I've planned it with them, allowing for some unexpected changes, but I felt he needed to try to do something without me/dad/granny?

OP posts:

Donki · 03/01/2014 12:02

Great sympathy, the YD has similar issues, and I am worried sick about transition too. I will need to find someway to help him be more independent and adventurous ...

I am sure he will be OK with his big sis!

PolterTurkey · 03/01/2014 12:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

Nerfmother · 03/01/2014 12:10

Glad I'm not alone
It's not so much the learning, it's the other bits. And I can't drop him off, can't trust him to walk safely.
Really hoping he copes with this and lets his sister be in charge. He can't play out (several incidents) all of his friends are slowly filtering down to those with SN and he wants to do stuff.

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EllenJanesthickerknickers · 03/01/2014 12:11

There was a really long support thread on SN education three years ago, when my DS among others was at that stage. Some had statements, most didn't, one went to SS so a wealth of experience. I'll look it up. It was long, so may be daunting, but if you have a spare hour or two...

Original poster

Nerfmother · 03/01/2014 12:11

Donki, I paid for him to go on a residential weekend in the summer to get him practising. They had lots of sen experience and it went well.

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Original poster

Nerfmother · 03/01/2014 12:12

Thanks Ellen, would be good. I've held off applying for a statement and now I'm hoping the next school is really good and won't need one.

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EllenJanesthickerknickers · 03/01/2014 12:15

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs_education/1171065-Moving-up-to-secondary-school-lets-flap-about-it-together

I think that's why it's such a good thread. Lots of different situations. If you see what can be done in a 'good' school, you can request/suggest/ demand it?

Original poster

Nerfmother · 03/01/2014 12:18

Thanks Ellen. It's a grammar , and the sen dept were just so 'yeah we know all about aspergers' in a kind of reassuring but knowledgeable and not heavy way? Nothing phased them - OCD, tics etc so I feel that's fine. It's the stuff a statement can't really do, like make people like him.

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Flappingandflying · 03/01/2014 12:59

They'll be fine and it's really good that he's doing this with his sister. Just hold my hand when Flyingboy goes on hs first driving lesson.

The start at secondary will probably be OK but it would be good if he knows he can go somewhere at break or lunch times if things get too much. Brown stuff generally hits the whirling object round about the sostice in late October. By that time staff are getting more demanding, the 'nice to year 7 ' thing has worn off the older kids and the homework seriously kicks in, nights are dark and they just get more tired.

Donki · 03/01/2014 13:04

The YD has been away several times with Cubs - but hates Scouts :( . The sessions are much less structured (the leaders say they are trying to encourage independence, but it is leading to problems with bullying) - and the leaders do no seem willing to make any adjustments for the YD.

Original poster

Nerfmother · 03/01/2014 13:18

We stopped scouts - you aren't alone there in finding it not so great.

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Original poster

Nerfmother · 03/01/2014 13:19

Sorry flying, missed you! Had a text to say all okay at the moment (they have found pizza!) good point about October, it's really easy to think the honeymoon period will last forever.

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Ineedmoretinsel · 03/01/2014 16:01

Hi nerf and others with DC's tranfering to secondary in Sept. Dd3 is also moving up so I am worried too.

We have had a much better experience of Scouts fortunately. Our leaders are very switched on about SN's and some of them work in the SN world.

At the moment that is the only form of independence she has had but it is a step.

We are in the process of trying to get a statement for her.

Hope your Dc's trip has gone well

Donki · 03/01/2014 16:34

I know a lovely Scout troop that would suit the YD, lovely switched on leaders, other scouts with SN (whom I teach and who would love to meet the YD). It is about 8 miles away. And full with a long waiting list (and about to get longer with a new cub pack starting) :(

The leaders of the YD's troop are enthusiastic leaders - but with very fixed ideas about what Scouts do/how it should be organised and no idea about SN. They just think that if you don't thrive in the troop you are not Scout material..... and better off elsewhere. Then when the scout leaves, it is proof that they were correct. The young person can't have been scout material in the first place, or they wouldn't have left.

Donki · 03/01/2014 16:36

Ineedmoretinsel we too are trying to get a statement at the moment.

The 6 weeks initial waiting period is up - so we should get a letter on Tuesday.... (no doubt refusing to assess, but we will deal with that when it arrives and appeal. Unfortunately I will be away and DH will have to deal with it. I have done all the correspondence so far. Argh!)

Ineedmoretinsel · 03/01/2014 17:27

Yep, we got our refusal to assess letter just before xmas!

We do have some new evidence so are meeting the LA rep to try to convince them that they really do want to assess.

Fingers crossed for all of us on this journey

Donki · 03/01/2014 17:33

Refusal to assess letter arrived this afternoon.
I now have 2 months to get everything together and get private assessments.

Nigel1 were are you? If you are who I think you are, expect a phone call on Monday... and a letter in the post.

Ineedmoretinsel · 03/01/2014 17:53

Good luck donki

lougle · 03/01/2014 18:06

How did it go, Nerf, are they back yet?

Original poster

Nerfmother · 03/01/2014 19:13

Yes all went fine, no need to glad the autism card at anyone, and dd seems to have organised him okay. Really really pleased - it's a bit less formal than an adult like your mum taking you out

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Ineedmorepatience · 03/01/2014 19:39

Well done to your Ds, Dd and to you of course for being brave enough to let them do it

Donki · 03/01/2014 20:15

Well done to all in the Nerf household!

Original poster

Nerfmother · 03/01/2014 22:03

Thank you! Feels like a massive thing they did! He is over the moon at being slightly off the leash!

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Ineedmorepatience · 03/01/2014 22:08

lougle · 03/01/2014 22:08

How awesome, well done to you all

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