Afraid for my son

[GoodnessKnows]

On Tuesday, I was told that my achey hip is actually referred pain from a tumour on my spoke.
My DC are 6 and 3. My DS was 6 this month. I believe he has HF asperges. Sometimes not so HF. Lol
I was going to take him to Tinsley House, having been waiting and sticking my head in the sand. He's doing so well. But I'm seriously scared for him. I doubt I'll be going to TH now. Likelihood is I'll be having a load of tests the day before. How will he cope when my 'achey hip' is dealt with. What if kids tell him nasty or scary things in the playground? I am so sad. You wouldn't know it as I'm in no pain and although anxiously withbg for The Call, I'm going to Santas Grotto, etcetera
Who will look out for him. I work so hard to make sure he's ok. Sad. No more words. ;(

Spine. Not spoke

So sorry to read this. I was diagnosed with breast cancer a couple of years ago and know how scary this waiting period for diagnosis is. Do you have any family or friends that can help with your children? My family do not live close to us but did rally round when I had hospital visits.

The other thing I would recommend is that you notify school as soon as you can so they can make adjustments / watch out for changes in behaviour as your son may pick up on your stress (mine certainly did!!!). Because my sons picked up something was wrong lots of tantrums from ds1) we told them very early on (infact before I had a formal diagnosis because they messed up the first biopsy). I still think this was the right thing to do.

For them the thing that worried them most was the changes in routine and the different people looking after them so anything you can do to get them used to this would be helpful.

Hospitals are not always the most flexible with appointment times but it is always worth asking to get school-time appointments - sometimes they will be cooperative. They sometimes can visit you at home e.g I only found out towards the end of my treatment I could have had chemo at home. We tried social services for help at one point but they didn't want to know but I do have a dh so may be different if you are a single parent.

(((Hugs)))

Thank you all. Yes- routine will be important and I'll have to try my best to maintain things. My DCs adjusts poorly to changes such as throwing things away (won't let me throw 8 year old Primark boots away. I have told school and nursery for exactly the reasons you describe. I'm isually stressed anyway - maybe that could explain my DS ' behaviour anyway. Lol
My DD is diddly (3) and goes along with things. I'm hoping she'll adjust. Things I imagine I'll need are to have a bed in the lounge downstairs. That'll be exciting for them.
I introduced the topic to my DS yesterday. Told him that I have a bump on my back that the doctor can take away. He was adamant that it was just where I was still growing & that everyone has that. So much so that I could sense his anxiety about the whole thing. I used an analogy of the lumps in the soup I make (veg stock cube that's not dissolved ). He hates those bits. I said 'imagine having one if those in your back!" We both laughed and said yuuuuuujk.
" I don't want one of those in my back, do I!" He seemed comfortable with that and changed the topic to Peppa Pig. So I'm happy with that so far. I'll have to broach handling me with care at a later date.
;)

Really hope your lump turns out to be benign - lots of them are - but also just remembered that charities like macmillan produce booklets to explain your illness to children which might be helpful. They are designed for quite young children so would be helpful even for your three year old. They explain things like having to be careful of Mum as she might be a bit sore etc.

When are you having your next lot of tests? - I hope they go well. If you need some hand-holding whilst you are waiting for your results there is a support thread in general health (tamoxifen something or other) that supports ladies with undiagnosed lumps or undergoing treatment that is really helpful. They are very liberal with chocolate and cake too!!! One of the ladies who posts regularly has HFA herself so may also have some helpful advice.

Hello
I can't find that thread at all. Would you be able to put the link in here for me?

Latest Tamoxifen thread

Hope this works - never done links before!

Well done! I've no idea how to do links. It did work and it's so kind of you to point me in the right direction. I've had so much wonderfully helpful support on MN. It's getting me through.